Page 114 of Untouchable
Even now she could want it again.
What did that say about her, about what kind of woman she was, about what kind of daughter she was? There was something twisted and unnatural about her that she couldn’t beat back into submission.
They went back to the party, and Caleb was more handsy than he’d been before. She wasn’t sure exactly what was causing it, but she had a few ideas.
He was anxious or angry or helpless about something—whatever guilty thing he’d done that Vinnie had brought up in that back room. And he was trying to distract himself and feel powerful again with her.
She understood it. She’d done the same thing with random men—and with Caleb—over and over again herself. Bury yourself in sex, in sensation, in some kind of show of power, so you don’t have to acknowledge all the things over which you have no power.
She could sense the same thing in Caleb now, and she was pretty sure it would get more intense when they left the party and were alone.
He would want to fuck her hard and rough.
And she would let him even if she was so scared and confused and rattled right now that sex was the last thing she wanted to do.
Because sex was what she had with Caleb, no matter what ephemeral feelings they were playing with. It was the only weapon she possessed in this battle.
Even if she used it against herself.
She had to get things back to normal between them, and she knew just how to do it. It didn’t matter if she didn’t want it. Right now sex was all she had to work with.
The evening went on and on until finally Caleb said she looked tired and asked if she wanted to leave.
She said yes gratefully, wanting desperately to feel fresh air and not be surrounded by strangers.
As they were leaving, Wes came back over. He mentioned a few things in parting to Caleb about his mother and his plans for going back to Paris, and then he took Kelly’s hand.
He held it longer than he should have. It almost felt like he was about to come on to her. Kelly stared up at him blankly, wondering what was happening as he leaned toward her and whispered in her ear, “I’m not sure what you’re hiding, but keeping secrets from Caleb is a bad idea.”
23
Caleb was usedto feeling guilty, although he could usually shake it off better than this.
But something about the clash between his feelings for Kelly and his conversation with Vinnie had left him with a guilt so heavy it was unbearable.
He liked who he was with Kelly, and he didn’t like other things he’d done—the other man he’d been—to raise their heads in her vicinity.
There was nothing he could do about the sins of his past. They were done, and no recompense could be offered to absolve him of them. Most of the time he was fine with that, but he couldn’t shake the feeling tonight. The weight of it intensified everything else he was feeling too.
It was probably why he got so jealous when Wes leaned over and whispered something in Kelly’s ear as they were leaving.
He had no idea what his friend was telling her, but he didn’t like it. Not because he thought Kelly would ever respond to the other man, but because it indicated something about her that he didn’t know.
Her reaction was just a casual smile, but it didn’t look genuine.
Something bothered her about what Wes had said, and she just shrugged it off when he asked.
Caleb didn’t say anything else. He took Kelly by the arm and led her outside to where his chauffeured car was waiting.
He wasn’t sure why it bothered him so much, but it did. Wes had no business talking to Kelly in private, and Kelly had no business keeping it from him.
He told himself to get over it. Nothing important had happened. It was one of those nights where everything stood out in starker contrast. Where every feeling, thought, and impulse felt stronger and more significant than it should.
It probably had something to do with the hot sex they’d had before they left the house, and it definitely had something to do with the lingering guilt from his conversation with Vinnie.
Kelly and what had happened with Vinnie were among the few things in the world that left Caleb feeling out of control.
“Wes seemed nice,” Kelly said, seeming a little distracted. She looked like sex embodied in lush, golden form in her red dress and tousled fall of hair, and his body reacted to the sight of her.
