Page 54 of To Love or to Lose
December
Chapter Fifteen
169 days until graduation
Things between Jameson and me have been uneventful since our argument in the Callaghan’s sitting room on Thanksgiving. I haven’t spoken to him, and he hasn’t tried to speak to me. I’ve concluded that the dynamic we have is for the best.
Of course, that doesn’t mean my mind hasn’t been constantly replaying the scene where Jameson Beaumont grabbed my wrists and pushed my back up against a bookcase.
I catch myself touching my lips as I sit in AP Literature, imagining the moment. Even though I hate to admit it, the scene in the Callaghan sitting room has been a recurring fantasy of mine. If I had been pressed up against those shelves for a minute longer, Jameson and I would have done something we both deeply regret.
Yet, I can’t help but wonder if I really would have regretted it, considering the prospect of kissing Jameson has been the only thing flooding my mind.
I boil my brain down, attempting to understand all the content within it, until I conclude that the only probable reason for my traitorous thoughts is simply physical attraction, nothing more.
I snap my eyes back toward the whiteboard, ignoring the fact that Eloise is looking at me as if she knew exactly what I was thinking about. I copy down the notes, shaking the idea that Eloise, or anyone for that matter, is aware of what happened between Jameson and me.
Nobody was there. Nobody saw us. I have told no one about it.
It’s safe to conclude that, if no one has found out after almost two weeks, then the odds are pretty good that nobody ever will.
I look up again at the board after writing the first sentence, but my view of the board is being obstructed.
“Gen,” an unfamiliar voice says. I look up further to see a girl standing in front of my desk. A traditionally pretty girl with striking blue eyes and dark black hair.
For a moment, I think she’s Valerie Mason, one of my friends who lives in New York, but once I take a more thorough look, I realize I have no clue who this girl is.
“Yes?” I ask, trying to lean to the side to see around her.
“I wanted to let you know that Briar Hart wants to talk to you.” The girl tells me.
I feel my head involuntary lean to the side. “Why?” I ask, confused.
Why would Briar Hart want to talk to me?
She shrugs. “I don’t know, she asked me to tell you.”
I nod. “Okay, I’ll find her later,” I say. She finally moves out of my way as I attempt to remember if I have any classes with Briar.
I’m more curious than concerned that Briar is seeking me out. I barely know her, in fact, I know her thirteen-year-old sister better than I know her.
“Briar Hart is looking for you?” Eloise leans over to ask once the girl, whose name Istilldon’t know, walks away.
I don’t answer her question at first, because my mind is still attempting to recall that girl’s name.I know it, I know I do.“Do you know who that was?” I ask, pointing discreetly toward where the girl just sat down.
“Yeah, that’s Alexandria Zimmermann.”
I immediately recognize the last name. After being Student Body President for the last four years, I have looked at our class list at least a hundred times, and Zimmermann is the only last name starting with a Z.
Now, I have a face to put with the name. For a few moments until I forget it again, at least.
“How do you know her?”
Eloise looks at me like I’m clueless. “She’s been in this class all year, Gen.” I nod. I guess most people know their own classmates.
“Back to my question,” she says, tapping on my desk to get my attention. “Why is Briar Hart looking for you?”
“Why would I know?” I counter. “I haven’t talked to her yet.”
