Page 2 of Hypothetical Heart
It probably would have involved a set of keys and her date’s shiny new car.
“Please tell me you don’t see yourself ever loving him.” It’s the first thing I say, and my voice comes out as a plea. I know I sound desperate, but it doesn’t matter anymore. I’m not above begging Winnie to give me a real chance.
It's also not what I had been planning to say. Originally, I was only coming over to make sure she was alright, not to confess my feelings for her.
Well, it’s too late now.
She ignores my question. “Are you crazy? Why are you standing here in the cold?”
“Winnie, I can explain later. Right now, I need you to answer me.” When she doesn’t answer right away, I’m forced to swallow the lump in my throat. “Do you see yourself ever loving him?”
“I don’t think I could ever evenlikehim.” The emotion in her voice matches mine.
Looking at Winnie, her dress wrinkling as we both stand in the rain, feels like the two of us have been standing in the middle of a desert and this storm will be what saves us.
I pull her into me the same way I have every time I’ve hugged her up to this point. But this time, her frame makes it feel like I’m wrapping my arms around every good memory I’ve ever had, and I’m finally getting the chance to fully soak them up.
When she pulls away, she asks, “Now, will you tell me why you’ve been standing on my porch?”
“I didn’t know what time you’d be back,” I reply, running my hands through my hair to keep it from sticking to my forehead.
“I would have called you,” her voice strains. “I told you I would.” She did, after I demanded she call me as soon as she got home.
“I know you would have, but I wanted to be here.”
There’s a huge difference between me coming over here because I want to and me coming over because she called and asked me to. I know that difference means something to her, which is why I will always show up before she even has the chance to ask.
“What happened?” I take a step off the porch, meeting her halfway on the cobblestone path.
Her eyes keep fluttering shut because of the sheets of rain pouring down between us. Her sandals are in a puddle, and her rain-soaked appearance is beginning to match mine.
Yet I can still see the tears glistening in her eyes.
“He told me I had to choose.” I see a tear roll down her face, mixing with all the raindrops coming from her hair, and I know exactly what she’s suggesting Hayden said.
He told her to choose.
Me or Him.
The thought feels like a noose tightening around my neck. This is what Genevieve was talking about when she said the date didn’t go well.
It’s the ultimatum that will haunt Winnie and me for the rest of our lives because everyone knows the rumors.
Everyone knows how much our moms want us together and how probable it seems that we’ll end up together.
I try not to imagine the conversation, “So you told him?—”
“I told him to fuck off,” she says strongly, taking another step forward.
“Winnie,” I sigh.
This shouldn’t be how this goes.
Except, she doesn’t even look fazed. “There’s no universe where I would ever choose anyone else over you.”
“Are you sure?” I ask, taking another step forward. “Because if I need to take a step back, I can, if that’s what you really want.”
It would kill me, but for her, I would do it.
