Page 3 of Built to Fall
With all that being said, it doesn’t take a genius like Kara to figure out where she might be headed tonight. Her bomber jacket and mini-skirt are a dead giveaway.
“Anyways…” Eden drags out, turning back toward the large canvas. “Are you sure this will look good here?”
“Yeah. I don’t mind it.” It’s the truth in the nicest way I can muster.
“Kara! Did you take my blow dryer?” Meredith’s voice cuts through the apartment, making Kara give us guilty, wide eyes.
Eden’s eyes flit toward the kitchen, narrowing on the counter. “You’re getting toothpaste everywhere!”
“Sorry, sorry,” she mutters through her mouthful of toothpaste. Yet, as she walks back toward her room, another glob drops from her mouth onto the floor.
“Kara!” Eden chases after her, shooing her away.
Kara simply waves her off. I’m sure she’ll clean it up sooner or later. Although Eden will probably get to it first.
If I had to describe the dynamic between the four girls living in the apartment, it would be easy to categorize each of us.
I’m the sarcastic cynic. Eden’s the exuberant people-pleaser. Kara is as if reckless abandon met borderline genius. And Meredith’s a deadpan mystery.
It’s an odd mix of personalities and pasts, all folding into this fourth-floor apartment in a New Haven brownstone. And maybe I haven’t figured out exactly how I fit back into it yet.
But even in this place, where sleep doesn’t come easy, and I’m still figuring out how to trust my friends again, and Aunt Carrie’s questions feel like impossible tasks, this is still my home.
I’m reminded of it every time Meredith yells at Kara for stealing a razor, or when I look at the butcher block counters and see the red ring stain from a wine glass. All of the reasons we bicker, and won’t be getting our security deposit back.
A smile cracks my face as I head back into my bedroom, grabbing my phone and taking it off mute. “Sorry, my roommates were asking me something.”
“No worries,” Aunt Carrie replies. “How are they?”
“Good. I think.”
“Evangelina…” She’s well aware of my tendency to isolate myself, and that’s what she thinks I’m doing.
“What else do you want me to say? I can’t speak entirely for them.”
She sighs through the phone. “Evangelina, I understand you’re hurt, but are you seriously going to pretend nothing happened to you?” There’s a long, pregnant pause. “You’ve lost enough irreplaceable people in the past few months, don’t you think?”
I’m well aware of the fact. It’s exactly why I’m so nervous to completely let my guard down. “I'm not losing all of my friends just because I don’t know how to read their minds.”
“Not my point.”
“It’s easier this way. Trust me.”
People lose people all the time—lovers leave, friends fade, parents die—it doesn’t mean the world stops spinning.
Even when it feels like yours has.
“I’m not trying to be pushy; I hope you know that,” Aunt Carrie assures. “I’m worried about you. I don’t want you to turn to avoidance.”
“I’m not avoiding anything.”Not anything I’m willing to admit, at least.“I’m just trying to get back to my normal life.”
“Yes, yes,back to normal. I know.” She sounds suspicious. “Are you sleeping, at least?”
I don’t answer for a long moment. I don’t want to lie, but I also don’t want her to worry. “I’m working on it.”
I can tell there’s something more Aunt Carrie wants to say, but before she can, there’s another knock on my door.
It’s Eden again. “Lina? Do you think you could help me hang this up?”
