Page 33 of So I Married an Alien
Amara beams.“Exactly!”
I help her as best I can, watching and learning everything she does so I can do my best to emulate it.In the future, perhaps I can have dinner ready for her when she gets home.
That night, we turn on a movie again, but we do what Amara calls “making out” instead of watching it.She sits astride my lap once more, and my culans rise, eager to be let out.But I keep them where they belong, simply enjoying her with my hands and lips, curious where they will lead me next.
A few days later, my new clothes are ready.Amara flings open the front door and brings them inside with her, absolutely ecstatic.
“Try these on and then let’s go pick you up some new pants!”
Each garment is folded neatly inside a paper bag, and when I pick them up, I’m surprised by the quality.We use synthetic fabrics onNew Dro’thar II, but these appear to be natural ones, soft but sturdy and thick.
The top item is a deep, dark blue with lighter blue trim around the collar and sleeves.I eagerly head into the bathroom to change, as I don’t think Amara is ready for me to walk around “bare-assed.”I leave my leggings on, then strip off the stained, torn robe that came here with me.The moment I have these newpants, I’m going to throw my old clothing in the garbage.
I put on the shirt, and I’m pleased to find four holes exactly the right size and shape for my arms, and the collar sits neatly at the base of my throat.The image I see reflected back in the mirror is… strange.That Karthinian doesn’t look, well, Karthinian anymore.It’s an odd sight, seeing myself dressed like a human, but one I don’t mind at all.
When I emerge from the bathroom, Amara leaps to her feet.
“Oh!You look amazing!”She rushes over to pet the new shirt.“Try on the next one!”
So we do this with all seven shirts, which come in dark blue, light blue, dark gray, white, brown and purple.All simple colors, Amara points out, that will be easy to coordinate.
Next, we’re off to the clothing store, which is a shock to my system.Amara worried about the club when she should have worried about this “department store,” which appears to be an emporium of options.There are clothes absolutely everywhere, in all manner of colors and sizes.
“Too many choices,” I murmur to myself as we walk past rack after rack.How is one supposed to choose anything?
Eventually, we find the pants, and I try on a few pairs made from a starchy, unforgiving blue fabric that Amara calls “jeans.”I don’t care for them, but she likes the way they look, so I give them a try.
“Dang,” she says when I come out wearing a pair with my new dark blue shirt.Her eyes are as big as saucers.“You look fire in those.”
I preen, glad that she likes them.I pick a handful of them in different shades before she introduces me to the “sweatpants.”
Oh, do I like the sweatpants.I will happily sit on the couch and watch television in them.I buy two pairs because I have a hard time imagining I’ll want to wear these stiff “jeans” unless we’re going out on the town, as Amara calls it.
After we check out, I wear the jeans home, and my wife finds excuses to touch my butt as we walk.I’m pleased that she likes it, as starchy as these new pants are.
Today, for the first time, I’m beginning to feel like an Earthling.
ChapterThirteen
Amara
Wow.I didn’t think seeing Roth’kar in tight jeans and a form-fitting shirt would make me quite so hot to trot, but here we are.All the way home, I resist the urge to glance over at him, because I know it makes him nervous when I’m not always looking at the road.
“What do you think of going out tonight?”I ask as I pull into the parking garage.“Having a date night?”
Roth’kar cocks his head as he unbuckles his seatbelt.“Date… night?”He squints the way he always does when his translator is working.
“Like we go out together to a restaurant, have a nice dinner, and it’s all very romantic.”I swoon as I get out of the car.“There’s a pretty nice place downtown that I like, but I don’t go there much.”I don’t really have anyone to go with.Occasionally, Kendall and I have stopped by for drinks after work, but I always spied on others on dates with envy.
“Romantic,” Roth’kar repeats as we get into the elevator, carrying bags of clothes with us.“I’m not sure how to do this.The translator is supplying me images of candles and red flowers.”
I laugh.“Roses, probably.It’s a tradition to sprinkle rose petals around when you’re trying to seduce someone.”
Roth’kar furrows his brow.“You decapitate flowers and spread around their remains to show love?”
“Uh, I guess you could say that.But the candles are about the lighting.You want the right kind of lighting when you’re… you know.”
“I do not know.”
