Page 21 of Shifting Fate
Arias
Fuck. I fucked up.
As my post-climax euphoria faded, reality hit me—shit, not again.This wasn’t good. In fact, this was the exact opposite of good. Dallon’s heavily made-up face was smushed against the pillow, his glittery purple lips puffed out on a sleepy exhale. What had I done? Panic clawed at my skin. I nudged him, but he only moaned and nestled deeper into the sheets.
I was still buried to the hilt inside of him, too. Shame and dread filled my stomach with tiny, skittering insects that would surely bore holes in my flesh the longer I laid here. I attempted to pull away, but my knot kept us tied together, tugging painfully when I tried to move. Damn it!
By the time my cock softened enough to pop free of Dallon’s tight grasp, I was shaking. I threw myself off the bed and raked both hands through my hair. I stared down at his limp body, my cum leaking out of his used hole. Nausea swamped me and I spun away as my anxiety peaked.
I need to get out of here.
My heart thudded hard, harder than the bass booming from the party downstairs, wild and out of control. Panic closed in and, too ashamed to look back, I tore the door open and fled down the stairs. I pushed between the gyrating bodies of costumed party-goers dancing to the beat, apologizing to a gender-bent Batman when I nearly knocked her over. She flipped me the bird on my way out.
I burst through the front door. The chill of the late October air caressed my sweat-damp skin like a kiss of death. What did Ido?Gods above, I was a monster. My wolf’s fur bristling against my skin, my change overcame me. I buckled over and dropped to all fours.
I fled the city streets to find myself running through the woods. They were eerily quiet. The creatures in the trees kept their silence, as if they were judging me. I pinched my eyes closed on a whine and pushed myself until I was panting for breath.
Just get home. Don’t think about it.
But how could Inotthink about it? I’d probably just ruined everything Tristram had worked for. The allegiance with Amber Run and Westwind, our new territory—everything. Because the moment Rhine heard what I’d done…
I clenched my teeth, fending off another wave of nausea. I might as well start packing my bags.
I stumbled up the front steps of our cabin, shifting back. I tried the doorknob, but it was locked, so I located the key Tristram had stashed in the fake dog poop, hidden in the flowerbeds, and unlocked the door.
From there, I unraveled.
I paced the floors, yanking on my hair in hopes that the pain might dull the panic screaming bloody murder in my skull. I kept picturing Dallon, helpless beneath me. God, I’d been so rough, my wolf utterly in control, leaving me grasping to hang on for the ride.Thiswas why I didn’t want to get close.Thiswas why I couldn’t have a mate. Not Dallon. Not anyone! I couldn’t even control my own bestial urges.
My wolf growled and flashed his teeth, annoyed. In his mind, Dallon was his and he’d just proved it.
This is your fault!I snarled back. I cursed and shoved the couch out of my way. The legs scraped over the hardwood with a metallic screech. I gasped in deep lungfuls of breath, my head dizzy.
“Arias? What the hell is going on?” Tristram’s voice was faraway and muddied beneath the steady growls of my inner-beast. I gripped at my arms as fur spiked through my skin almost painfully. I needed to keep him locked away. No more. I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t breathe!
I parted my lips to scream, to shout, to dosomething.Tristram’s hands clamped down on my shoulders. He gave me a hard shake. I growled and yanked away from him. My fangs crowded my mouth and cut my tongue, and when he stepped into my space, I shoved at him.
I was on the floor so fast, it wasn’t funny.
Tristram pinned me to the ground, straddling my body. His own teeth were bared. “Enough!” His fingers dug into my shoulders, but it was the raw power in his voice that caused my wolf to shrink back. Giving up the fight.
Feeling like I could breathe again, I dropped my head back against the hardwood and groaned. “I’m sorry,” I managed to choke out. “I fucked up. I fucked up so bad. I crossed the line, Tris. God, I practically raped him.” My throat closed up. I squeezed my eyes shut.
“What? Who?” he demanded, an edge to his voice.
“Dallon! He was…” A broken sound escaped me. “He was gunning to get laid at this party and I followed him. I knew I shouldn’t, but I couldn’t stand the thought of Colby touching him and my wolf, he took over, and I—fuck!”
I scrubbed my hands over my face, still laying on the hard floor. “He probably hates me.” Or at least he would, when he woke up and realized exactly what I’d done.
“Breathe,” Tristram murmured, rocking back on his legs. He caught my hands in his and pulled me into a sitting position. I didn’t meet his gaze, but he wasn’t done with his line of questioning. “I don’t understand. You were at a party and you approached him?”
“Yeah. I couldn’t stop myself.”
“Did he say no?”
I frowned and tried to think past the haze. Had he? “I don’t think so, but he was angry—”
He cut me off. “Did he scream for help?” I closed my eyes. No. I could picture that part clearly. The moment Dallon tasted me, the moment he realized who I was, he’d come alive under my touch—pissed off and confused, but alive. Tristram spoke again. “Did you hurt him, Arias?”
