Page 36 of Saving Nevin
He smiled, but it was wistful. “Of course, I was too young to have kids at that time, so I settled for picking out names for the barn cats instead. Every spring, we’d have at least two litters of kittens, and I’d name every single one of them. I spent my mornings and my evenings in the barn, playing with the babies, imagining they were my own. I miss them.”
The paint roller hung suspended in mid-air as I stared at my mate, who suddenly seemed so damn sad. All I wanted to do was to wrap him up in my arms and hug all of his broken pieces back together again, but I knew better than to think it was that easy.
Time would heal most wounds, I knew, but he’d been through so much in his life that it would take years of love and compassion before he truly found his happiness. That was okay. I would be with him, by his side, every day, every step of the way.
Because I loved him.
“What happened to them?” I asked.
“When Rex chose me as his Omega when I turned eighteen, I left my father’s homestead, and the barn cats, behind. Rex wasn’t a big fan of pets, so…” He shrugged. “It’s fine.”
“No, it’s not.”
“Kace.” Our eyes met, and his brow furrowed. “Please. Just let it go.”
I swallowed hard, but nodded. “Okay, honey.”
It damn near killed me to turn away and start painting again, to leave Nevin bathed in silence, but he needed space and I needed to respect that. The last thing I wanted was for him to run away from me. I wanted to be his safe haven, the person he could go to when life became too much. His lighthouse in the darkness.
Thankfully, he wasn’t quiet for too long. “Um… But I was thinking, back to the names. Since we’re having a boy, maybe you’d be okay with the name Zechariah?” He hesitated, then added, “That was my brother’s name. We called him Zee.”
“The one who passed away?” I asked gently.
A shadow fell over Nevin’s face as he nodded. “Yeah.”
“Can I ask what happened? You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”
“No, it’s okay,” he murmured. “There was an accident when we were pups. We were playing together outside one winter, seeing who could make the biggest snowman. Zee must’ve gotten bored of it, because he went over to the pond and started poking at the ice with a big stick. I don’t remember much, because I was young, but he kept trying to convince me to go out on the pond. I was too scared. I told him it wasn’t safe. So he went out onto the ice to prove to me that it was, but it cracked and he fell in.”
He shivered, his fingers flexing into his palms. “He was frantic, crying for me to help him, but I was too young and too small to do anything. I tried to fish him out with that big stick, but I wasn’t strong enough. By the time I ran up to the house and got Dad, Zee had drowned.” He dropped his head, looking down at his hands.
My heart ached for my mate. The idea of losing any of my siblings tore a hole through me. I loved them so much, and to lose his brother so young? “Damn, Nev. I’m so sorry. How old were you?” I asked gently.
“I was nine and Zee was twelve,” he said. “After that, my dad went into a deep depression and my life became very lonely. That’s when I started hanging out with the barn cats. They became my best friends. Pretty pathetic, huh?”
“Oh, honey.” I set the paint roller down and went over to Nevin, dropping to my knees beside him. Brushing blond bangs away from his face with the backs of my knuckles, I pressed a kiss to his forehead, lingering there for a moment. “I’m sorry. You’ve been through so much, and yet you’re still so damn strong.”
“I don’t feel it,” he whispered.
“Well, you are.” I pulled back and placed a hand on Nevin’s swollen belly. “I think Zechariah is a wonderful name, Nev, and I’d be honored to name our son after your brother. Baby Zee. It has a ring to it, doesn’t it?”
Tears brimmed in Nevin’s blue eyes, right before he threw his arms around my neck, sending us both toppling to the floor. He clung to me like his life depended on it, while I gently hushed him and rubbed his back. “Everything’s gonna be okay. You’ll see.”
25
NEVIN
“Oww. Damn.”I leaned forward and placed my hands on my lower back, which throbbed with an otherworldly ache. Ugh. None of the Omegas in my pack ever told me that being pregnant hurt like this. My feet were swollen, my back was sore, and the baby used my insides like a trampoline at all hours of the night.
All I wanted to do was sit down, soak my feet, and take a nice long nap, but I was determined to finish cleaning the kitchen before Kace got home from running his errands.
Yeah, I was tired and achy, but my Alpha’s surprise and joy at coming home to a clean house was more important. Maybe it was the past rubbing off on me—keep my Alpha happy or else I’d lose him—but I knew, deep in my heart, that Kace would never judge me for that.
I was just finishing up when Kace’s truck came bouncing up the gravel drive. A few minutes later, he burst through the front door with a big smile on his face. He opened his mouth to say something, but froze when he saw the counters all spic-and-span, the oven meticulously polished, and the sink basins cleaned. He looked at me. Our eyes met. His crinkled at the corners as his smile grew even bigger.
“Aww, baby, you didn’t have to do all this!” he said. “I would’ve helped you when I got home.”
I ducked my head with a small shrug, but I couldn’t hide my own smile as I threw my arms around him in a big hug. Well, as big of a hug as I could muster with the baby getting in the way. I really was “growing like a weed” as Xan so eloquently put it.
