Page 34 of Shadowing My Dreams
“That’s it?”
“What do you want me to say, man? Look, I want you to be happy more than almost anyone. You’re my best friend, and I love you. I’d do anything for you. But your track record of relationships is zero, bro. Now you tell me after a few days…”
“A week.”
“Ok, a week – that you’re falling for the ghost psychic dude. It’s… I liked him. I did. I do. But it’s just a surprise. I want you to find someone and fall in love. You are an amazing guy, and I think I’m one of the only people that you’ve ever let see that side of you. I’m glad you’re sharing it with someone else. I’m just surprised it’s ghost boy.”
“Because he’s not my type?”
“I mean, sorta, yeah. But there are ghosts. He’s a psychic who speaks to ghosts. It’s a little out there, right?”
“You’re the one who brought him to me.”
“To help you with your ghost problem, yeah. Trust me, after what I saw, this place is seriously haunted.”
“You have no idea.” I laughed. “Look, I will agree that I was as surprised as anyone. But it’s happened, and I really want to see where this will go.”
“That alone proves the man is a miracle worker. So you can handle the ghosts?”
“I seem to be doing ok with the one I have.”
“The psychic thing? That would freak me out if he could read my thoughts.”
“He doesn’t read thoughts – he reads energies.”
“Same thing.”
“Maybe? But yeah, I think I’m good.”
“Are you looking for permission or something? It’s your life, man. Just don’t hurt ghost boy. He seems like he would be fragile.”
“Yet he’s so strong. I really like him, Daveed. I would never hurt him.”
“Not intentionally. But you have hurt people, man. You just never took the time to think about it.”
“I know. I had a lot of time to think about all of this lying in the hospital. You know you were the only one to come and see me? Well, Maurice came with you a coupleof times, but no one else ever did. I asked the nurse one day and was surprised by the answer. Just the tall and handsome black man and his boyfriend are how I found out that no one cared enough to come to see if I was still alive.”
“That’s…”
“They would have come to the funeral if I had died. Some of them, anyway. But not many. I didn’t deserve for any of them to come see me, D. I hadn’t been a very good friend to anyone besides you, and even then… I wasn’t as good of a friend to you as I should have been.”
“You’ve never treated me bad, Jack.”
“But I didn’t go out of my way to tell you how much I loved you either. To show you how much you mean to me.”
“I knew, though, man.”
“I want to do better with this second chance, D. I want to deserve someone like him. But he does scare me so much. I’m getting attached to him, and I can’t stop thinking about him. I think he could hurt me just as badly as I could ever hurt him.”
“That’s… I love you, J. You’re my best friend, and all I want is for you to be happy. He’s cute.”
“He’s hot,” I stood up and walked over to him and sat down beside him on the couch. “I’m gonna hug your sorry ass now.” I wrapped my arms around him, and he squeezed me tightly. “I love you, Daveed.”
“I love you too, Jack.”
“So… Let’s talk about something else. I just made it very deep and depressing in here.”
“My renters are crazy over on Agnes Ave. Those crazy gay guys broke up. You know, the ones who are always complaining? Anyway, one of them just rented my other house a block away on Ben. I think he just wanted to spy on his ex. They were always fighting, apparently.”
