“What was that look?” I snap. “I saw that. Share with the class, Grim.”
Puppy frowns, it looks cute and somewhat sinister. “What is this class?”
I go to answer and snap my teeth together, grinding them. “Oh, no, I’m not getting distracted. What was the look?”
“There was no look!” Stix assures me.
I glower between both of them, my temper growing colder. “Do not lie to me.”
Stix glances behind me and shrugs.
“There’s someone upstairs,” Wilder says gently.
The basement door slams shut and is hurriedly locked. I don’t take my eyes from my shadows. When they refuse to speak, I turn and pad up the stairs. Vines rip out of the ground and tear the door apart.
“Thanks, Wilder.”
He mutters something that I don’t hear. The culprit is caught in a massive web and is slowly being pulled towards something clear and viscous. A chunk of the matter splatters on the floor, holding its shape for a few moments before it collapses into a liquid.
“That looks bad,” I say absently. “I don’t want to touch that.”
“Good instincts,” Wilder says. “It’s known as Arachnia Blood. It’s a thick substance that will turn any animal into a liquid high protein juice ball for the spider when she returns.”
“Oh, that is lovely,” I snark.
The guy's getting closer to the liquid, and he’s struggling now. A moment later, his screams start.
“I don’t want to die,” he wails loud enough to make my teeth ache.
“We could put him out of his misery? Or just speed up the process?” Stix says absently.
I only just catch his words. Puppy could eat him first, I add helpfully and then put that thought aside. I am not the person who hand feeds people to my boyfriends.
Boyfriends? Mates?
Wait, they lied to me.
“Get him down,” I say to Wilder, but my voice is softened and intimate. I’m not mad at him.
The blob freezes instantly, and the forward momentum of the human’s imminent death is halted.
“Who are you?” Frost growls menacingly.
“I’m Coby Lucas Wainsworth. I’m twenty-one. Where do I live? Oh, crap, I can’t remember. Oh, I know! I live at One hundred and one Albright Lane, Effusion City. I have a mother and a father, and I’m a good boy, and I never get into trouble.” He bursts into tears.
“What’s it doing?” Puppy asks me as he moves closer.
The suicidal human throws himself to his knees and grips Puppy’s hands tightly. “I’m too young to die, and I haven’t even had sex. Please, dude, I’m twenty-one and a virgin. I need to have sex. I can’t die. I’m too young. And, and, and I have got a mortgage, yeah, that’s right, I’m paying off the house. I haven’t done anything. People don’t kill me. Please.”
“If he offers to suck Puppy’s cock, I’m all for putting him back in the spider’s web,” I say grumpily. I really dislike the way he’s touching and pawing at my Grim.
“Please, man, please. I didn’t see nothing. Listen, bloke to bloke, I swear, I didn’t see nothing. I promise. I’ll tell anyone who asks that I didn’t see you perform magic and turn into a creepy lizard.”
I wince. Poor word choice, Coby.
“Lizard?” Puppy asks in a soft but deadly voice. “You think me a lizard?”
“To be fair, Puppy, you do have scales,” Stix adds helpfully. “You’re like a Komodo dragon.”