Page 27 of Hearts of Resistance
‘There are no men here,’ she said back, keeping her eyes downcast. ‘I’m just trying to get my baby to sleep. Look around all you like.’
The officer waved his hand and she turned and went back up the stairs.
‘Shh, my darling. Shhh,’ she said, loud enough for the men to hear.
The German soldiers came into the house like bulls, knocking things over as if they took pleasure in ruining her home. She shut her eyes at a loud bang, wondered what they’d broken, but then realised that she actually didn’t care. They could trash her house all they liked, but she wasn’t letting them find those soldiers.
Heavy footfalls alerted her to the fact that someone, or more than one someone, was coming up her staircase. She moved into the small space between the crib and the closet, rocking her baby and holding it up to press her lips to its little doll head.
‘Please, let me put my baby to bed,’ she pleaded. ‘There is nobody else in this house. Nobody but my child and I.’
‘We’ll see,’ said the officer who’d been the one to knock on her door. ‘Check under the bed!’
She knew German, and when he issued the command in his native tongue she understood immediately.
Rose held her breath, hoping one of the men hadn’t decided while she was downstairs to change his position. She watched as the officer received a headshake from one of his soldiers. She kept jiggling the baby but stayed silent, not wanting to say the wrong thing or aggravate the situation. She also didn’t want to make too much of a fuss of her ‘baby’ and have any of the men come too close.
Rose waited, the room full of strangers. She’d been worried about the hidden men sneezing or coughing or doing something to give themselves away, but now, staring at the Germans, she was worried about a whole lot more than that. She was a woman all alone, with the enemy.
She started to cry, and it didn’t take any effort to summon the tears.
‘Please don’t hurt me,’ she pleaded. ‘Please, just let me put my baby to bed. You can take anything you like.’
The officer laughed at her and the other men all joined in. ‘We are the conquerors. You can hate us all you like, and wewilltake whatever we want, with or without your permission.’
She started to tremble, looking down and nodding. She was scared. Scared of being raped, of them finding out her baby was nothing more than a doll, of being tortured. But mostly she was scared of the men she’d tried to save dying on her watch.
Help me, Peter.She silently pleaded.Please, help me.
‘Take whatever you want, fill your pockets with food,’ the German officer ordered.
There was still noise downstairs, and within minutes that noise doubled as the beat of the men’s shoes thumped down the stairs and joined those below.
Rose waited, staying so still she could barely breathe. She waited until the noises stopped. Until the German voices were gone, until there was a final bang as the door shut. And then she dropped her baby to the ground, a silent scream straining in her throat.
The room started to spin, everything went black with bright white dots flashing into her vision. Rose saw the ground coming up to her, as if the floor was ready and waiting to swallow her, and there was nothing she could do to stop from falling.
‘Help her!’
She heard the frantic, deep whisper as arms caught her and broke her fall, just as everything went cold, dark and silent.
Rose woke to the crackle of a fire, bathed in warmth as she stretched, eyes still shut tight. She could smell something good cooking, and she wondered what Maria was making for dinner.
She opened her eyes, faltered as she wondered where she was, whom the low voices belonged to that she could hear. And then it all came crashing back to her; what had happened, what she’d been...
‘No!’ she gasped. Where were the men? Had they been found? Killed? She remembered falling but once the room had gone black, she didn’t know what had happened.
‘Shhh.’
Rose tried to jump up but her legs buckled. Where was she?
‘We don’t even know your name.’ A woman’s voice made her turn. She regained her balance, stood more slowly and looked around the room.
The men were sitting there, in clothing that looked so familiar. It was...She smiled and reached her hand out to touch the wall, steadying herself. It was Peter’s. They were all wearing clothing that belonged to her Peter.
‘I hope you don’t mind,’ the woman said, smiling at her and making her way across the room. She’d been in the kitchen, where the delicious smell was coming from, and the men were all at the table.
‘I, I’m sorry, who are you?’ Rose asked, glancing down at her arm and seeing that it had been properly bandaged. It gave off not so much a burning, searing pain now as a deep thudding one.
