Page 35 of The Berlin Sisters
‘It’s because Eliana is the only one of us who can pass for not being a Jew,’ David said, his voice rising in a way Ava hadn’t heard before. ‘Isn’t it?’
She took a deep breath. ‘My father wants Eliana to stay with us, as his niece, before she begins a job in the city. He believes she will be useful to the resistance, if she is willing, and that no one will think to question her lineage as a Müller.’
Eliana gasped at the same time as David glowered at Ava. ‘You want to leave me to rot up here, while my sister fights? I’m to stay here and be forgotten?’
‘David—’ Ava began.
‘I’ve already told Hanna, I have to do something, I have to doanythingother than stay up here like a coward. I don’t know how much longer I can stand it.’
Ava looked up at him and into clear blue eyes. ‘I am telling you that if there was anything I could do, anything my father could do, he would have done it by now. But you are not a coward.’ Her lower lip trembled as she paused, seeing the pain on his face, thetrembling of his body as he stood before her. ‘There is only one coward in this room, and it is me, not you. So please don’t call yourself that name again.’
She saw the tight clench of his jaw when she spoke, knew how much it frustrated him to remain in the attic and accept his fate.
‘David, I promise that we will find a way to get you out of here, but right now Eliana can help us. She can become part of the resistance in a way that you can’t. And quite frankly, you’re right. She can pass for one of my family members in a way that you can’t, and there’s nothing I can do about that.’
‘Your father is adamant this will work? That she will be safe if she leaves us?’ Herr Goldman asked.
Everyone looked to Ava.
‘Herr Goldman, Papa wanted me to tell you that Eliana will be treated as family in the same way that Hanna and I are, due to his position and the lineage he has created for her. He said that there will be risk involved, as the family she will work for are part of the resistance, but that it is a worthy cause. Both Hanna and I are working with my father, so he said he’s risking his own daughters, too, not just Eliana.’
‘Please, Papa,’ Eliana implored as Ava watched. ‘You have to let me go. I cannot stay here knowing that there’s something I could be doing to help.’
David turned away, going to the far corner of the attic as his sister stared after him. Ava watched him for a moment, before deciding to go to him – as much to speak to him as to let Eliana exchange words with her parents in partial privacy.
‘I’m sorry,’ she said, quietly, as she approached him. ‘I am truly sorry, for everything.’
He grunted, but she saw his shoulders move up and down, as if he’d taken a deep breath.
‘What if there was a way you could help? Something you could do from here?’ she asked.
‘Ava, there’s nothing I can do from here. Don’t you think I’ve tried to think of something? If I have to stay here, then I’m useless.’
‘Useless is better than dead.’ She clamped her hand over her mouth. She hadn’t meant to say that. ‘I’m sorry, I—’
‘You were being honest,’ he said, laughing despite the soberness of their conversation. ‘But honestly, sometimes I wonder whether this is worth it. Because this isn’t living, Ava. What we’re doing up here, this is surviving, nothing more. I don’t know how long I can continue like this, how long anyone could live like this.’
She looked at David,reallylooked at him, and for the first time she saw him for who he truly was. And it broke her heart. He was just one man, but suddenly, to her, he represented all the men she’d never thought about when they’d disappeared.
‘Our life has gone from being full of friends, work, study...’ He looked away, as if he were naturally turning to look out of a window, only there wasn’t one, because it had been permanently covered with blackout fabric. ‘I’d just begun to study to be a doctor, did you know that? I had my whole life planned out, so many dreams about what I wanted to do, about the places I wanted to work.’
Ava swallowed away a lump of emotion in her throat. ‘David, I want you to have those dreams again, I do. I don’t want this to be your life any more than you do, but right now, there’s nothing more we can do than promise to keep you safe.’
‘Then speak to your father again. At least try to get me a gun, any kind of weapon, to protect my parents if they come for us.’
‘I will get you a gun, David. I give you my word,’ she said, lifting a hand and hesitantly touching his arm, feeling his tense muscles soften beneath her touch. ‘If that’s what you need to feel safe, then consider it done.’
They stared at one another for a long moment, before he eventually nodded.
‘Thank you, Ava. I will never forget the kindness shown by your family to ours.’
She was about to pull away when his hand closed over hers for the briefest of seconds.
‘And you’re not a coward, Ava.’
When she turned back to Eliana, all she could think about was David and how his words had touched her. He would have made a brilliant doctor, for he was clearly kind, compassionate and smart. She only hoped that one day he’d be able to put those skills to use. She also looked down at her own hand, the palm she’d touched him with, wondering how she’d ever believed it was wrong to make contact with a Jew, that somehow she could become sick or be harmed by them by virtue of their religion. It seemed ridiculous now, as if she’d woken from a dream.
‘Eliana?’ Ava asked, looking from her to her parents.
