Page 7 of The Berlin Sisters
They walked slowly back to the house arm in arm, and even though she knew no more than she had the day before, she felt lighter for having spoken to him about it. She also believed that Lina’s innocence would be quickly proven. Perhaps Lina would even have her job reinstated once they’d questioned her and realised their error.
‘Mama will be wondering what’s taking so long,’ Ava said, smiling to herself as they neared the house.
‘I’m certain she’ll be putting dinner on the table as we speak,’ her father replied, opening the door and holding it for her to walk through.
The smell of roast goose wafted to them the moment they set foot inside, and Ava and her father quickly washed their hands before joining her mother and sister. It had been weeks since she’d had her mother’s cooking, and her mouth was salivating by the time she reached the table.
‘Mama, this looks wonderful,’ Ava said as she sat down beside her sister and eyed the feast. There was roast goose with stuffing, and potato dumplings and vegetables. It felt like such a treat after the much more basic food they’d been eating at the Berlin apartment for the past few weeks. Even though they had more than most, their father having access to food that she knew had been in very short supply for others since the last Christmas, they were still more often than not making one-pot meals.
Her father poured himself a glass of wine, and as Ava surveyed the room, she could have almost imagined they weren’t at war, that it was just a regular Christmas at home with her family. She wondered what it would be like once the fighting was over, whethershe’d have another holiday like this here, or whether she would be in her own marital home, or even the home of her husband’s family. She also guiltily wondered what other families were eating right now, especially those in the city with only their ration cards to shop with. Her father seemed to follow Hitler’s word to the letter, but he certainly hadn’t shown any interest in the vegetarianism that had been suggested by their great leader, taking great pride in being able to hunt for hares or trade with the local farmers when he was home. She for one hoped that Heinrich wouldn’t want to go without meat when they were married – vegetable dishes weren’t her specialty, and she always found herself hungry if her plate was filled with only plants.
‘I would like to suggest a moment of silence before we eat,’ her mother said, her soft voice catching as she slowly sat down in her chair after serving them all. ‘To remember the family who are not with us tonight. They are gone, but forever in our hearts, and never, ever to be forgotten.’
Ava reached for Hanna’s hand, squeezing tightly as silent, fat tears slid down her sister’s cheeks; as her own eyes filled with tears, too. She forgot all about her husband-to-be as she remembered her little nephew Hugo who wasn’t with them, and her brother-in-law Michael who should have been seated across from her, knowing that her sister would never be able to celebrate holidays as fully as the rest of them ever again.
They all sat, silent, remembering, the pain surely as fresh for Hanna in that moment as it had been when it happened, until Papa finally lifted his wine glass and addressed them all, his own eyes glinting as he looked at each of them in turn.
‘Let them never be forgotten.’
It was only after Ava had lifted her knife and fork that she realised they’d forgotten to turn to their Führer’s portrait on the wall and say their mandatoryHeilHitler. It was very unlike her father to misstep in such a way, but given her sister was still in mourning, and the moment’s silence they’d just shared, she decided not to mention it.
Chapter Four
Ava walked around her childhood bedroom, touching framed photographs and looking at all the books on her shelf, the mementos she’d collected over the years. If the war hadn’t happened, she’d likely have spent a lot more time at home, but instead she was usually at the Berlin apartment, which was many times removed from their country house. It was modern and warm, with three bedrooms, and positioned conveniently close to everything in the city, but it still never felt like home, no matter how many nights she slept there. Some days she loved walking out on to the cobbled streets and being able to meet her friends or have coffee with them, but other times she craved the solitude of Bogensee, often wishing she was there. And over the past year there had been the matter of the air raids, which were getting closer and closer, and more intense in their ferocity and volume.
She knew that parts of the countryside were being hit relentlessly too, but she felt so much safer with space around her than the close confines in the city. Not to mention that their bomb shelter in the garden here was much more desirable than the nights she had to go down to the basement of their apartment block, or hide in a public shelter if she was on her way home when the warning siren sounded.
Ava had walked to her dresser and sat down, deciding to brush out her hair and change into her nightgown in preparation for bed, when she heard a thump, and then another. She smiled to herself and rose, quick to discard her hairbrush. Over dinner they’d talked about old photo albums and memories of their little vacations by the water many years ago, and she guessed that Hanna must have decided to poke around and look in the attic before bed. Ava had missed her terribly over the past few years, as they had more often than not lived separate lives due to the long hours they both worked – Hanna even more so than her – and so she decided that bed could wait. She could catch up on sleep later, especially if it meant spending some one-on-one time with her sister, and she was also eager to see the photographs if Hanna managed to find them. She was also conscious that Hanna might be finding it hard to sleep; Ava imagined the memories she was wrestling with wouldn’t be conducive to slumber, which made her want to be with her sister all the more.
Ava walked to the very end of the hallway and saw that the narrow staircase had been pulled down from the ceiling. She’d been right, Hanna was definitely up there. They’d left their parents sitting in front of the fire, so she knew she wouldn’t be disturbing her mother or father – they’d seemed content in each other’s company, reminiscing about Christmases past as they threatened that they would haunt their daughters forever if they sold the country house when they were gone. Ava and Hanna had both smiled to each other across the room – they were both united on the decision that the house would stay in their family for generations.
She climbed the stairs, careful with each footfall, although there was some light coming from a lamp flickering upstairs that helped to guide her way. As children they’d sometimes snuck up in the dark, each trying to pretend they were so brave when in fact they were almost paralysed with terror at night.
‘Hanna, what have you found!’ Ava called out, her eyes trained on her feet so she wouldn’t misstep. ‘I heard—’
Ava froze. Her words died in her throat, gurgling away as if she were choking on them. Four strangers were sat on the floor, cross-legged and blinking back at her, eating from white plates with little blue flowers on them that she recognised from her own kitchen, and what appeared to be a replica of the very same meal that Ava herself had just consumed. The youngest of the two men had a piece of meat on his fork, but it was suspended between the plate and his mouth, a line of grease across his lips as he stared back at her.
‘Papa!’ Ava screamed, almost falling down the ladder as she stepped back. ‘Papa, come quickly!’
The light from the single oil lamp flickered, and Ava found that she couldn’t tear her eyes from the four people looking back at her: two men and two women. Who were they? And what were they doing in her attic? What were any strangers doing in her house! As she heard her father’s heavy footfalls approaching, one of the women spoke, taking her by surprise. Ava edged back further, careful to avoid the open trapdoor behind her as her eyes darted around for a weapon, anything to protect herself with. She reached out, hoping to connect with an unused lamp to defend herself.
‘Ava,’ said one of the women, softly. ‘It’s me. Eliana.’
The younger of the two women slowly stood, leaving her plate of food on the floor. She smiled, nervously, and there was something familiar about her face, as shadows from the lamp flickered across her skin, something—
‘Eliana?’ Ava whispered, her heart racing as she took a tentative step forward, the lamp she’d been reaching for forgotten. Eliana, her old neighbour and school friend? Eliana, the Jew? ‘Eliana Goldman?’ Ava looked at each face in the attic more intently, her fear rising instead of abating, even as she realised that they werenot strangers to her. But they were Jews, and that was possibly even worse.
Ava’s stomach twisted as Eliana nodded. She needed them to get out of her house, and she needed them out now!
‘Papa!’ she screamed again.
‘Ava, I’m so sorry you had to discover us here like this.’
‘I, I—’
Ava’s father appeared beside her then, and when she looked at him, when she saw the way his face seemed to crumple as he looked between her and the family,she knew. This wasn’t a surprise to him. If it were a surprise, he’d have yelled and strode forward, taking the two men seated in his attic by force, marching them from his home. Instead, he only nodded to the family, before turning his attention back to his daughter, with a look that could only be described as annoyance. And the annoyance wasn’t directed at the intruders, but at her.
Her mother came up the ladder then, followed by Hanna, and Ava had an unfamiliar sinking feeling deep in her stomach as they all stood and blinked back at her. She was the only one who hadn’t known who was hidden in their home. They’d all been keeping this a secret from her, all of them! They’d sat together and had dinner only hours earlier, sharing memories and laughing, all while keeping what was truly going on in their home a secret from her. Without telling her that they were hiding an entire family right above her!
