Page 57 of The Secret Librarian
‘Your wedding day?’ Avery asked, reaching out for it and holding it close to her face as she studied it.
‘It was one of the happiest days of my life, for all of us, and I often think if I could have only frozen time that day ...’
‘Your Hugo was gorgeous,’ Avery said, as Camille teared up. ‘Your brother was very handsome, too. He has the same eyes as you, I think that’s what it is.’
Camille stared at the photograph, unable to take her eyes from it.
‘And what’s that?’
Camille didn’t pass this to Avery. ‘It was a letter he wrote me, when we first joined the Resistance. Or should I say when he joined it,’ she said. ‘He joined first and it took me more than a week to decide to do the same and join him.’
‘It must be so comforting having this, as a memory of him.’
‘I kept it to remind me why I joined the Resistance in the first place. I always kept it in my jacket pocket in case my confidence or commitment ever wavered, but now I keep it because it’s one of my only reminders of the man I loved. I suppose it’s all I have left of him.’
Avery looked at the photo again before passing it back to her.
‘Camille, why are you showing me all this?’ Avery asked. ‘Why now?’
‘Because I want you to understand who I am and why I am so determined to find out who was responsible for my husband’s death. And I want you to know that when I have been with Kiefer, that I mean no disrespect to my husband. I could never fall in love with a man like him, could never have true feelings for someone I’ve given everything to fight against.’ She shook her head. ‘He’s a Nazi,and no matter how nice he can be at times, or whatever kindness he might have shown me, nothing will ever change what he is.’
They stood facing each other for a long moment, before Camille pressed a kiss to the photograph and placed the items back beneath the floorboards.
‘Are you any closer to discovering who you’re looking for?’ Avery asked. ‘Do you truly think you can find out who it was who betrayed you?’
It was as if Avery knew she was holding something back. Camille took a breath and slowly let it go before answering her. ‘Kiefer confronted me that morning before I met you at the beach. He agreed to give me information about the double agent I’m searching for.’
Avery’s eyebrows shot up. ‘He did?’
‘In exchange for keeping up our little romance until he left,’ Camille told her. ‘But this morning he came to me and told me that the spy I’m searching for left Lisbon for Portugal recently.’ She paused, wishing there was another way. ‘Avery, he believes that this man is on his way to France.’
She let the words hang between them, watching as Avery’s face fell, and Camille hated that she was responsible for her pain. But she wouldn’t be a true friend if she kept it from her.
‘James?’ Avery whispered, her voice coming out as a gasp.
‘I’m sorry,’ Camille said, tears pricking her eyes as she saw how heartbroken Avery was. ‘I know how you feel about him, and I’ve been trying to figure out a way to tell you all day. I’m sorry.’
Avery blinked away tears, wiping at her eyes as Camille’s own heart broke for her. If there was one person in the world she didn’t want to hurt, it was Avery.
‘I truly believed you were wrong about him,’ Avery said. ‘He was so charming, when I was with him, when ...’ She shook herhead. ‘Well, none of that matters, does it? I should have trusted your instincts from the start and listened to it.’
‘If it helps,’ Camille said, ‘I wish I was wrong.’
Avery nodded. ‘Do you think he’ll come back to Lisbon? Or is he long gone?’
‘I wish I knew, but trust me, if he returns, he’s going to wish he hadn’t.’ Camille reached for Avery’s hand. ‘Please don’t hate me for telling you.’
There was a steely determination in Avery as she looked back at her, and Camille marvelled at how much her American friend had changed since the day they’d first met. She had a resilience that Camille would never have guessed at. When Camille closed her eyes at night, the nightmares were slower to come, and she knew it was because of their friendship. Only last night, she’d lain awake seeing Avery usher the little Jewish girl and her mother into the bookshop as she kept lookout, listening to the click of her camera. She hadn’t been able to stop thinking about the way Avery had kissed the child’s head, her eyes shining with unshed tears as she’d said goodbye to them – the work they were doing helping people in ways that would never be forgotten.
‘I’m proud of you, Avery,’ Camille said. ‘I know I was hard on you at first, but everything we do, all of us, is worth it. Every little thing, right? And the photographs you’ve taken, the documents you’ve helped me with ...’ She paused. ‘What you’ve done for those people is life-changing.’
Avery smiled back at her, and the words settled between them. The thing about her and Avery was that they seemed able to let their feelings be known without even saying the words these days, and not for the first time, Camille had the notion that she finally knew what it would have been like to have a sister.
Chapter Eighteen
Avery
‘You look beautiful.’
