Page 14 of The Cowboy's Redemption
His smile gathered steam, then lost its upward momentum, before finally crashing and burning a few heartbeats later. He didn’t pretend to misunderstand, which made the awkwardness worse.
“If things were different, I’d like nothing more,” he said. “But Tanner and I were friends, and I can’t forget that. Tate and Ford are my friends too, and they took his death hard. Tate in particular.”
So much for saving face. Pointing out that they need never know—that she was only interested in the physical act, and only this once—was unlikely to make any difference. And she wouldn’t beg. She wasn’t that desperate. She clenched her jaws so tight that her temples throbbed from the pressure. When would she no longer be associated with Tanner? When was she going to be allowed to extricate her life from his?
“Tate did take it hard,” she allowed. “As far as she’s concerned, he walked on water.”
“Not water, exactly. She knows better than that. But she was his twin, they were close, and you changed the dynamics between them. She was jealous of you. She’ll get past it.”
Maybe. Maybe not. There was so much more to it than that. If Dana had taken up time that Tate thought should have been hers, it was only because Tanner had been jealous and clingy and needy with Dana. Demanding. Careless.
She blamed him for the fallout of his carelessness, which hadn’t been careless at all. He’d planned it, and she was still soangrywith him.
Maybe this sudden, renewed interest in sex was her brain’s way of telling her it was time to get past all the pent-up anger and move on with her life. To put him behind her for good.
But sleeping with his best friend or anyone even remotely connected to him was clearly not going to work. Not for Levi and not for her. She’d have to find another solution to the loneliness that gripped her late at night.
Chapter Five
Levi
The guest cabinwasn’t far from the main house, which was good, because it was also a respectable distance from the bunkhouse where Levi stayed through the week, therefore removing him from temptation.
Low solar lights lined the path to the cabin, offering enough of a glow for them to see where they were going, but thankfully, not enough to have a clear view of their faces.
His, he was sure, reflected confusion and a truckload of regret. She’d never expressed any sexual interest in him before, and it had caught him completely off guard. He contemplated theif notsof this situation.
If not for the Shannahans. If not for Tanner being a good friend. If not for the glaringly obvious fact that Dana was working through issues even greater than Tate’s, because between this, and accepting a drink from a stranger the night of the rodeo dance, he had to ask himself—what the hell was going on in her head?
Whatever it was, he had no intentions of becoming a mistake she couldn’t face in the morning. Grief did strange things to people, and he wasn’t taking advantage of hers.
But he couldn’t deny that turning down temptation washard. Especially when the temptation was Dana.
He had no trouble imagining how good it would be. The first time would be quick, to take the edge off, and get any first-time awkwardness out of the way. Then he’d work on slow and thorough, so they could get to know each other better, and figure out what things they each liked. He was partial to exploration. He loved women’s bodies and discovering where they liked to be touched. What made them eager. He’d take the whole night to find out.
His jeans grew uncomfortably tight. He now understood how it felt to purchase a major prize-winning lottery ticket—then either run the ticket through the laundry by accident or give it to the barista at the Wayside Café as a tip by mistake.
“Here we are.” He opened the cabin door and found the light switch. A lamp in the corner burst to life.
The cabin was a large, single room with a comfortable-sized bathroom attached. Ryan’s wife, Elizabeth, had decorated it. To Levi it looked like a tequila sunrise, all bright reds and yellows, and deep shades of orange—from the scattered rugs on the wood floor to the abstract art on the rough-hewn, log walls. The overall impression was of comfort and warmth, made rustic by the natural wood.
Tangerine curtains clung to a large double window that reflected evening right now but in daylight, overlooked miles of green and purple alfalfa fields, aspen, polar, and cottonwood trees, and the rocky spires and pinnacles of the badlands off in the distance. Multi-hued cushions splashed across the wide window bench.
“It’s lovely,” she said.
“Wait until you see the view in the morning.”
He tried hard to pretend that the queen-sized bed with the burnt-orange spread taking up most of the space in the room didn’t exist. Since it was too big to ignore, he was only fooling himself. Or making a fool of himself. It could go either way.
Meanwhile, she looked cool and pretty as ever. No one would ever believe that she’d just propositioned him. Or that he’d turned her down. The throbbing ache restrained by his jeans left no doubt in his mind as to what had transpired.
“Thank you for everything,” she said. “I really didn’t want to drive to Billings tonight, then have to turn around and return in the morning to speak with Otto.”
“It didn’t make sense for you to have to. I’m not sure what’s up with Otto on that.” He suspected the old man hadn’t felt up to negotiating and hoped to be in better form for it come morning.
Levi had decided he wasn’t going to get involved by helping either one of them get the best of the other. He wasn’t their mediator. Their business was between them.
He set her overnight bag on the floor. “Well. See you in the morning,” he said, except he doubted he would. She’d haul her trailer out while she thought he was sleeping, and he planned to be up and at work long before dawn.
