Page 49 of Vanquished By A Viscount
“Change of plans?” Barbara looked exceedingly worried.
Whatever she worried might have happened, Charlie quickly put her at ease with, “Mr. Howard Bradford of the South EasternRailway has arrived at Hawthorne House to discuss business with Lord Felcourt and myself, and he has been convinced to stay and give an informative lecture about the current state of railroads in England.”
“Oh, how fascinating,” Lady Winifred said, glancing up from her horribly painted teacup with a smile. “I have been quite interested in the state of the railroads of late.”
“Dear, I do not think Lord Broxbourne cares,” Miss Martin whispered to her friend with a sly, knowing expression.
Charlie tensed, his mind racing through the usual set of panicked possibilities when he suspected someone knew the truth about him.
He forced himself to breathe and smile at his sister a moment later. What would an innocent young woman like Miss Martin know of men like him? It was more likely that she was simply teasing her friend because Charlie had shown no interest in marrying her.
But the unease remained.
“This is brilliant,” Barbara said, surprising him with her enthusiasm, and with the way she leapt up from her chair and stepped closer to him. “A lecture about English railroads will be just the thing. In fact, it is such a lovely idea that I believe the two of us should take the carriage and travel around to our neighbors, inviting them to this evening’s event.”
An abundance of fondness for his sister welled up in Charlie’s heart. Whether she wished to vacate Hawthorne House for her own reasons or whether she saw his tension and his need to get away for a few hours, he loved her for the suggestion. “Yes,” he said. “I will accompany you on your rounds.”
The two of them rushed off, making feeble excuses to the others. They would have prepared the carriage themselves if it would have sped the process along, the two of them were so eager to escape.
“I know my reasons for wishing to be away from the estate,” Barbara said once they had driven well beyond the grounds of Hawthorne House. “What are yours?”
Charlie squirmed under her all-too acute smile. “My reasons are not appropriate for a young woman of your sweet character to hear,” he said.
“Love troubles with Grayson, then?” she said, her grin turning even more impish.
“You know nothing of the matter,” Charlie told her, crossing his arms and looking out the window.
“I know you’ve spent the last four nights together, either in your room or his.”
Charlie made an incredulous sound, but his face burned and he was certain his expression was guilty. “How would you know that when you’ve been spending your nights away from the house in the cottage?” he asked.
“Servants talk, Charlie,” she said with a knowing look. “And servants know everything.”
Charlie grunted and rolled his eyes. Of course they did. Servants were the ones who truly ruled the world while their masters only believed they did. Hawthorne House’s servants had caught him and Grayson together more than once now.
“It is nothing,” Charlie said, still wishing to keep his secrets to himself. “We’ve merely had a minor falling out over—” He stopped, no idea how to explain Bradford to his sister. Any explanation would necessitate sharing far more desires and insecurities with her than he would ever be comfortable with.
“It will all work itself out in the end,” Barbara insisted, carelessly arranging her skirts on her lap. “And if it does not, you can come live in the cottage with me.”
Charlie laughed, despite the awkwardness of the moment. Whatever other peculiarities his sister might have had, she was a sweet and clever woman. “It may come to it at that,” hesaid, willing himself to bare more of his soul to Barbara. “It appears I might have a rival for Grayson’s affections, and I…I am uncomfortable with it.”
“And so you have run away from Hawthorne House instead of standing your ground and fighting for your lover?” Barbara suggested, one eyebrow raised.
Charlie’s eyebrows flew up at her astute observation. “Are you not doing the same?” he asked. “Are you not avoiding your husband rather than facing whatever temporary and insignificant trouble has cropped up between the two of you?”
Barbara huffed in irritation, then burst into laughter. She shifted from the forward-facing seat to sit by Charlie’s side in the rear-facing one, hugging his arm and resting her head on his shoulder. “Oh, Charlie,” she said. “We are a pair of ridiculous, lost souls. Neither of us has the first notion of what to do with love when it visits us.”
Charlie shifted to slide his arm around Barbara’s back so he could hold her closer. “Is that what it is? Was our education in the ways of love so inadequate that both of us would rather run from it than embrace it?”
“Yes,” Barbara answered firmly. She softened a bit to say, “Yours is the only love I have ever known, Charlie, and as I am learning, one cannot love a husband in the same way one loves a brother. I must love Robert more than you.” Her voice turned sullen. “But I do not want to.”
Charlie drew in a breath and glanced down at Barbara. Was that the difficulty that had arisen between Barbara and Robert? Did Barbara think she was being disloyal to him by being madly in love with Robert?
“I will always love you, Barb,” he said with feeling. “And I know you will always love me. We are allowed to love and adore more than one person in our lives. And I do not begrudgeyou any sort of affection or loyalty toward your husband at all. Robert has joined me in your heart, not replaced me.”
“It does not feel that way,” Barbara said with a sniffle. “It feels as if everything is changing and I am not entirely prepared for it.”
“We are never prepared for the changes in life,” Charlie said, kissing the top of her head. “We can only muddle along and do the best we can.”
