Page 113 of Filthy Little Fix
"Are you okay?"
The question sounds more like an observation than genuine concern. It's unintentional.
She stares at the cardboard box. It's empty. The collectible miniatures she kept are still on her desk. The colorful post-its are still on the computer. A cemetery of objects.
She gestures to the desk. "I needed this job."
I look at the computer screen in my cubicle. Off. The camera blinks. I look at the security cameras on the ceiling. Maybe Dante wouldn't like this. Maybe he's watching.
It's not the point now.
"I'll get some water."
It's a mechanical decision. She sniffs and nods. The filter is still functional, in the corner of the room, with a pile of disposable cups. I grab one, fill it, and return. Nicole's face is still streaked with tears. She takes the cup with trembling hands.
"They said it would be arestructuring," she murmurs, choked up. "What am I going to do now? I have bills, you know? My dad..."
Her voice trails off. I remember what Dante told me. One hundred thousand dollars in debt. Her father had two bypass surgeries. Her mother depends on a pension to survive.
I look at the miniatures on her desk, the little superhero and monster figurines she arranged so carefully. She didn't have the heart to put them in the box.
Behind them, the fern. Mine. Green, beautiful. She took care of it.
"You'll find something," I say. It sounds hollow even to me. I just turned down a salary that could support her family for a decade, maybe more. I float. She sinks. The image is clearer now. And uncomfortable.
She shakes her head. "It's not that easy, Leo. Not for someone who doesn't have... connections. Or… I'm not as good as you." She stops. Then she looks at me. "What happened to you? You weren't answering your phone, and no one knew about you. Chad was a nervous wreck."
I don't usually look away like this. But I do now. A strange shame crawls up my neck. "I had some health issues."
I like Dante's marks. Even if consequential, like these, which weren't made directly by his hands. I display them with pride. But it feels wrong here. It feels wrong to display them to Nicole. They are a symbol of a privilege that didn't reach her. This bothers me.
"Were you also laid off?" she asks softly.
I shrug. "Looks like it. That's life, isn't it?"
I see other colleagues saying goodbye, some with forced hugs, others with empty handshakes. All with the same look of veiled panic.
"I'll miss your bad jokes, Leo."
She forces a smile. It's the first time in a while that I've seen the real fragility of the world that doesn't bend to the will of the Volkovs.
Nicole used to laugh at anything I said. Most of the time, it wasn't even a joke.
Her gaze wanders around the cubicle, landing on the fern in the corner of her desk. My fern.
"Oh... before I forget." She leans over and picks up the small pot, handing it to me with ceremonial care. "I took care of it for you. Watered it every day. Didn't want it to die just because you were... sick."
I hold the pot. The only living thing on this floor that doesn't know this is the end.
Before I can formulate a reply, a loud, desperate voice cuts through the silence of the floor.
"Leo! Holy shit, man, you're alive! Where did you disappear to?"
Chad. He marches toward us, his hair disheveled by stress, with a cardboard box under his arm. Always the same thing. He completely ignores the boxes, the mass layoff, Nicole's tears.
"You disappear for a week, and we're here thinking you died or something, and then suddenly, BAM! I thought they'd keep the IT department, but they sent everyone packing! Can you believe it?" He throws his box on the floor. "Years of work thrown in the trash! And for what? For some multi-billion dollar subsidiary to swallow us whole!"
He leans in. He puts an arm around my shoulders and pulls me away from Nicole, who just accepts it, at this point. He whispers to me, "In the middle of all this mess, my headphones went missing. I don't want to accuse anyone, but Nicole's always been quiet, right? Staring at everyone's computer. She was here when they disappeared. Did you see them?"
