Page 65 of Reforming Lord Ragsdale
Lord Ragsdale opened his eye. “You want to pay me back?” he asked.
“Possibly,” Robert temporized. “I could pay you back, and then I could release Emma from her indenture.” His voice became contrite, hesitant even. “It’s the least I can do, Emma. I know that it has not been a pleasant situation for you.”
“It’s not that troublesome,” she said simply, looking down at the unread ships’ rosters she still held in her hands.
“You could do that,” Lord Ragsdale said, wishing suddenly that Robert were still at Oxford and had never considered poker.Couldn’t you have waited a week or so, Robert?he wanted to ask.I’m busy here with something of substance for the first time in my life.
But Robert was not through. He looked at Emma until she glanced up and met his eyes. “Emma, may I tell you what I would rather do with the money?”
She nodded and set aside the rosters. Lord Ragsdale could feel her tension, so he moved closer until their shoulders were touching.
“I would rather take all the money and go home, throw myself on my father’s mercy, and start repaying him what I owe.” He looked at Lord Ragsdale soberly. “I truly do notwish to gamble again. What would you have me do, John?” he asked.
I would have you take the money and run, Lord Ragsdale thought.Go home to Virginia, and leave Emma and me to sort through this terrible time.He looked at Emma, who was regarding the carpet as Robert had earlier and chewing on her lip.
“I think it should be Emma’s decision, Robert,” he said finally. “She’s the one who has suffered the most from all this and—”
“I have not suffered,” she interrupted quickly. She blushed and held out her hands to Robert. “I was prepared to, and maybe I even wanted to, but I have not suffered. And, Robert, you won’t believe what I have learned.”
Robert smiled at her. “He’s right, Emma. What do you want me to do?”
Please, Emma, do not leave me, Lord Ragsdale thought.If you go, I am sure I will not have the courage to propose to Clarissa and “fix my fate,” as you so ingenuously expressed it. I might not treat my servants right, or keep away from alcohol, or find anyone half so fine to handle my correspondence.
“Your decision, Emma,” he added, determined not to hold his breath and appear like a small boy.
She picked up the rosters again and looked at him, then at Robert. “Take your money and go home, Mr. Claridge,” she said quietly. “I know your father will be pleased.” She touched Lord Ragsdale’s hand. “Lord Ragsdale has promised to release me when he is engaged, and I think he has almost reached that point. I want you to go home, Mr. Claridge.”
Robert leaped to his feet, pulled Emma up too, and swung her around until she protested and told him to let her down. He kissed her on both cheeks and hugged her until Lord Ragsdale feared for her ribs.
“Emma, you are a game goer!” he said. “I will leave you enough money to pay your passage back to Virginia, if you should choose to rejoin us. I am sure Father will findyou a position as a teacher or nursemaid.” He went to the door. “And now I want to find Sally and tell her.” He leaned against the door. “Thanks, John and Emma. I wonder why I never noticed before what wonderful people you are.”
“Perhaps because we were not so wonderful,” Lord Ragsdale commented after Robert left the room. He looked at Emma. “My dear, I will release you from your indenture anytime you say.”
She took that in and settled herself more comfortably on the sofa, kicking off her shoes. “We have not yet finished the bargain, my lord.” She got up suddenly then and went to the desk. “Now I think you should write a note to Miss Partridge and tell her that you will be at her home first thing in the morning, so you can set out for Bath.”
He joined her at the desk, sitting down and picking up the quill.
“I know she will do terrible things, like make me propose,” he grumbled.
“And it will be good for you,” Emma insisted. “When you are finished, I will give it to Lasker and tell him to have the footman deliver it tonight.”
He did as she said, pausing here and there for advice on lover-like words. He finished and signed his name with a flourish. “I suppose you realize this means that I will be reformed, rehabilitated, married, and will probably turn into someone so dull that my children will wonder what their mother was thinking.”
She smiled at him. “Serves you right, my lord,” she replied, with just a touch of her former acidity. She took the note from him and opened the door upon Lasker, who appeared to be waiting outside. “Please have Hanley deliver this to the Partridges on Whitcomb Street,” she instructed.
“And bring us some coffee, Lasker,” Lord Ragsdale said as he returned to the sofa. “It’s going to be a long night.”
“I told you to go to bed and rest your eye,” Emma said, then blushed and added, “my lord.”
He resumed his former position on the couch. “I won’t leave, Emma. Sit down right here and let’s start looking.”
~
I am seeing the backside of too many dawns, he reflected several hours later as Emma finally admitted defeat after three readings of the lists.I would have quit after one reading, he thought, closing his eye to the smudged, faint lists, weary of looking.
Ever mindful of his eye, Emma had done much of the reading, going slowly through the lists, saying each name aloud and only troubling him when she could not decipher the words before her. He lay with his eye closed, listening to her, holding his breath when she paused, and sitting up once or twice when he heard her sharp intake of breath. But each time was a false alarm. There was no David or Samuel Costello on any of the lists they had searched so hard for.
“Could it be that the political prisoners were not even mentioned?” he speculated at one point. “I mean, if the assizes have no record, why should the ships’ manifests?”
