Page 55 of Every Good Thing
“Yes. No. Maybe.” He barely looks at me.
“It’s an amazing deal, Ben. If you’d hear me out, read the paperwork—”
“How could you do this without consulting me?”
“You called me a chaotic mess. I wanted to prove otherwise and solve the problem myself… and I did. I need to heal, and you need me to be more available—win, win.”
He grunts, looking everywhere but at me. “No. You refused to close when I asked you to. You would’ve found a way to keep the place running, even if it meant baking one-handed… and asking you to be more available didn’t mean I wanted this.”
I soften him with a light smile and trace the veins in his arm. “I told you I’d stop the world for you. That’s what I did. I thought it’d be… fireworks.”
“You did this for me,” he summarizes, closing his eyes tightly. His face pinches, and for a second, I almost expect tears to spit from his eyes—not the good kind.
“For us. Surprise,” I say, trying to be cute.
He remains blank, arms folded like a barrier between us, and shakes his head.
I square my shoulders and offer a soft smile. “This’ll give us time. We could discuss job options, ways to run Saddletree better, whatever you want. I love you and want us to fix what’s broken… I thought you’d be proud of me.”
“You made a huge decision that affects us all and could ruin Saddletree over one argument? That’s unreasonable.”
I raise my good hand delicately between us, trying to turn this calm again when I say, “It wasn’t unreasonable, Ben. And it’s not one fight. It’s us.”
“You can’t make these kinds of decisions over me, Lena. Not now. Not…”
He drags a hand down his mouth as if loosening his tight jaw and gritted teeth. A breathy pause brings his hands to his hips, but he seems stuck like he can’t get the words out.
“Not what, Ben? Not for a two-month vacation that we both desperately need?”
“It won’t be a vacation. It’ll be a circus.”
“You don’t know that,” I argue.
“Yes, I do. I see it all over Wilmington. They’ll come in and take over. Saddletree belongs to them now.”
“I thoroughly reviewed the details. It won’t be like that,” I say, though now tiny doubts fray my confidence. “You said I needed to do better with Saddletree. I made what I believe is a smart business decision that helps my family. That’s why I did it, Ben. It’s for us.”
He scoffs. “No. If this were for us, you would’ve discussed it with me, like you always used to. Agreeing to it without me is retaliation.”
The accusation makes my neck snap back in surprise. “What?”
“You’re pissed about Lauren and the job, so you did this behind my back.” He shrugs like this is obvious.
“That’s not true. I’d never be so fucking petty. How can you say that?”
“The evidence supports it—”
“Evidence, my ass. I was upset, yes, but I got over it. Stop blaming me for every shit thing. You’re only upset because I’ve hurt your pride. You thought you could show me how fucked up I run things around here, swoop in, fix everything, and play the hero. Well, guess what? I’m the hero. If you’d give it a chance—”
“Dictating a major decision concerning our household without me makes you feel heroic?” He huffs like he’s seething. “I’m sick of living around your edges, Lena.”
“What does that mean?” I barely manage to get the words out.
He steps closer, signing as he speaks. “We used to be different. I wanted things for us. Family vacations. More kids—”
“That’s not my fault. I’m forty, Ben. Even Ruthie was a long shot.”
“Yes, I know,” he puts his hand in the air as if to soften his words. “But look at us. We’re lucky to have her, lucky to have all of this, but we aren’t together enough to enjoy it, let alone grow our family. We could’ve discussed adoption or fostering.”
