Page 16 of Game On
Ella
I pluck a stark white piece of cat hair off my shorts, and then stuff the fabric into the back of my wardrobe. Gabi wasn’t home when I arrived back this morning. She’s gone out for a run, as the sticky note on my mirror told me, leaving me alone to unpack and process everything that’s happened since I touched down.
I’m typically grateful for time to myself, but I’m feeling a little resentful at this specific moment. It’s difficult—being somewhere new, adjusting to so much change all at once. And I don’t have anyone to unload to about last night, or this morning, or the complicated way I feel about sleeping with someone other than Jamie.
Our breakup wasn’t a clean one—it was a fracture deep enough to make me wary of ever letting anyone in again. Jamie was my first, my constant, the one I thought would always be there. And now that’s been shattered.
But it’s not solely Jamie I’m thinking of, wallowing about, it’s also the way I feel about myself. I’ve been inAmerica for less than twenty-four hours, and it feels as though I’m already making mistakes.
Sitting on my bed, I bury my face in my hands. “Pull yourself together, woman,” I mutter under my breath. I know I haven’t bothered to give it time, but I don’t want to be fretting over the past. This is my chance to move forward.
If only there was some magic recipe for forgetting someone you once loved so fiercely. Some combination of time, distance, and new experiences that would make everything else fade away. Last night, if only for a moment, I thought it was well within my reach.
But now, in the harsh light of day, it seems impossible again.
My relationship with Jamie was slow and steady. He was the first person to teach me what love felt like, the first boy who looked at me and saw the whole world in my eyes. For so long, he brought me warmth and a sense of home. We were solid together, comfortable in a way that can only be learned, not taught.
And then, last night, there was Hudson. He’s much different from what I’m used to—he’s loud where Jamie was quiet, bold where Jamie was unadventurous, self-assured where Jamie was … apprehensive, to say the least.
I suppose if Jamie Baker was my foundation, then Hudson Fox must be my tempest—intense and unpredictable. A force of nature wrapped up in a handsome smile and a perfect body.
But what’s done is done. I could spend the next two terms overthinking everything that’s happened, or I could focus onthe reason I’m here in the first place. To cheer with the best. To make the most of this opportunity in Nashville, breakup be damned.
I carefully set my nagging thoughts aside as I rifle through a bag of leggings on my bed. I’ve been showering and unpacking since I came home from Hudson’s place this morning. It was my first walk—no, Uber ride—of shame, and it wasn’t nearly as much scandalous fun as I’d hoped.
It’s nearly noon by the time Gabi swings open my door, her arrival announced by a jingle of keys and the light thud of her bag hitting the floor. She finds me sprawled across my bed, surrounded by half-unpacked suitcases.
Without a word, she plops down beside me, the mattress dipping slightly under her weight. “Looks like you’ve made quite the mess,” she teases, picking up a crumpled shirt and tossing it at me.
I manage a weak smile. “I’m working on it.”
Her eyes dance with curiosity. “So,” she begins in a sing-song voice, “tell me everything.”
“About what?” I murmur, hoping to sidestep the interrogation.
“Oh, I like it when you’re coy.” She waggles her brows. “Is that how you landed Hudson Fox?”
I groan, burying my face deeper into my pillow. “Is it really necessary to use his full name?”
“Absolutely not. Though his middle name would be a fascinating piece of trivia. But seriously, Ella, spill. I need all the details. Now!”
I sit up, tossing the shirt back at her. “There are nodetails to spill. It was a one-time thing, and I’d rather forget about it.”
Her expression softens, her teasing demeanor fading to concern. “Was it that bad?”
I hesitate. “No, it wasn’t bad at all. In fact, it was very hot. Too hot. It’s all just overly complicated, and I’d rather move on instead. That’s my new M.O.”
“Feels like there’s something else you’re not telling me,” she says, head tilted.
“My ex,” I tell her. “He’s studying here, too. He dumped me quite literally yesterday morning. A total prick who threw five years down the drain. So now, all I want to do is focus on the future.Myfuture, you know?”
I say it like it doesn’t sting, but the truth is, failure has been hitting me from all sides lately. Jamie, Hudson … it feels like no matter what I do, I’m making the wrong choices. It might be better, I think, easier, to keep men at arm’s length from now on.
“Say no more. I’ve got just the thing to distract you—from both Hudson and the loser who ditched you.” She gives me a wide smile, jumping back up onto her feet. “You can join me at the gym this afternoon. I promise it’ll help clear your head.”
“Actually, that sounds perfect. I could use a new routine.”
“Great!” Her enthusiasm is infectious. “Have you ever gone to an all-star gym? Do they even have those near Oxford?”
