Page 152 of Burning Ember
She turns the redheaded doll in her hands. I know she’s seeing the similarities. The hair, the blue-green eyes, the freckles on the doll’s cheeks, and even the blue, plaid shirt.
“I thought it was because . . .”
A pang of guilt spikes through me. I shake my head. “No, but I couldn’t tell you the truth at the time. So I let you believe that was the reason.”
While she reverently touches the doll, I take the tube out the bag. My fingers fumble as I work the lid off. It takes me a minute to pull the papers from the case and remove the elastic binding them. But when I do, I unroll the blueprints and lay them out on the bed of the truck for her to see. Then I bend down and get a few rocks to place at the corners. She tucks the doll in the crook of her arm, and she comes to stand partially in front of me.
Her fingers follow the lines on the paper, though she doesn’t actually touch it.
Her breath hitches. “It’s beautiful.”
Yeah. It was going to be beautiful.
After she scans it, I pull that paper away and let her see the back of the house. Her hand hovers over the back porch.
“I was going to put a porch swing right there. I thought if the baby had trouble sleepin’, I could bring her out here and rock her to sleep.”
I swallow the thickness blocking my throat. I pull away the next paper. A sketch is revealed, and a heavy weight presses down on my chest. My throat completely closes with emotion this time. It takes me a couple of seconds of me pushing it all down to be able to speak again.
“This is the nursery.”
Ember reaches out and studies the tree.
“The branches were book shelves. And the trunk had a door she could go through into a small little play room just for her.”
She traces the tree with her finger. “I designed this wall to have those letter blocks. You know the ones kids play with, the old-school wooden ones. They’d be shifted so maybe when she got older she could climb to the top and sit in this little nook here and read by the window.
“I was going to start a growth chart here, and then put the bed there. I wanted this arch to look like a half moon so if I used a dimmer light it would work like a night light in case she was scared of the dark.”
Doll sniffles and at the same time, I look at her in time to see a tear drop from her chin and land on the blueprint. I’ve been so lost in my design that I hadn’t realized how seeing this would affect her.
“Oh, God, I’m sorry.” She’s frantic as she sweeps the cotton of her shirt over and over the wet spot.
I still her hand. “Hey, it’s all right.”
“Mav, I’m sor—”
I turn her and cup her cheek. Tears are streaming down her face and filling her beautiful, teal eyes. She tries to look away from me, but I won’t let her. “Don’t. Don’t hide from me.”
I sweep her tears away. When I have to raise my shirt to get the new ones because they’re not stopping, I chuckle and she gives me an embarrassed, sad smile.
Hell . . .she’s the most beautiful creature I’ve ever seen. I slowly take the doll and lay it on the tailgate. Lifting her chin, I kiss her watery lips. “I didn’t think I’d ever let another woman get this close to me again. Didn’t trust a soul to know what makes me weak. I don’t know everything about you, but I trust you with this.”
Her hands slide around my waist and she lays her head on my chest. “This doesn’t make you weak, Mav. This makes you a good man.” Almost imperceptibly, she murmurs, “I know what you mean though. I didn’t dare tell anyone about Will. Not until last night.” Her arms squeeze me tighter. “I trust you too.”
After everything I did to her, she shouldn’t, but my heart fucking soars at the knowledge that she does.
I smooth my hand over her hair. “Maybe all the shit in my life was meant to happen. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be standin’ here holdin’ you. And I can’t imagine doin’ anything but this right now.”
For a long time we stay as we are. The only sounds are of the insects and the birds around us.
“It’s peaceful here.”
“Yeah, it is.”
“What are you going to do with it?”
My eyes travel over the wreckage. “I don’t know. Maybe sell it. I’d have to hire a crew to come in and bulldoze it, clean it up, but then maybe one of our clients could finish buildin’ here.”
