Page 18 of Crushing On Dad's Best Friend
Katherine
As my cousinKristen pulls me by the hand to the dance floor, all I feel is empty and hollow, a void where just a few minutes ago I was so excited andhappy.
How could I have let myself get so wrapped up inthis?
What would my parents say if they found out that Liam and I have been sneaking around? I know the consequences would fall on Liam more than they would fall on me. In my parents’ eyes, I can do no wrong. I’ve always been so good, suffocatingly good, in fact. My dad has always teased me for being such a good daughter. The one time I returned a book to the library after its due-date, I felt so guilty that I kind of forced them to let me volunteer to read books to the younger kids on Saturdayafternoons.
And because my parents think I’m such a goodie-two-shoes, I know they’d assume that Liam somehow pressured me into this. I couldn’t stand by and watch as I destroyed my dad’s life-long friendship with Liam. I couldn’t cause that strain to their relationship. They’re colleagues. They’re both partners at their lawfirm.
And Liam…if they thought he somehow took advantage of me. I couldn’t do that tohim.
And even if these complications weren’t enough of a huge red flag, I can’t give him what he wants. Marriage, kids, a family? I want all of those things, but if Liam wants them too, I can’t be the person to give them to him. I’m barely into my twenties and I still need time to figure out what I’m doing with my life. I want kids, but I also want a career. Liam doesn’t have the time to stick around and wait while I figure myself out. He needs a woman who is more his speed, someone who knows she’s ready to settledown.
This has to end before I get pulled in toodeep.
Kristen pulls me into the middle of the crowd and tried to twirl me, but I feel like my feet are stuck incement.
“Sorry,” I shout over the music, “I think I had too muchchampagne.”
“Are youokay?”
“Yeah, I’m just going to sit down for a littlewhile.”
She shrugs and grabs my sister, and I push past a few guys swinging napkins in the air, suddenly feeling dumb for being so happy. It was all exciting, shiny and new on Friday, but I guess that’s what Fridays are for: they’re the day you get to live out all the excitement you’d been building up over the week. Except that this Friday was the most Friday-ish Friday that ever existed. Without knowing it, I was looking forward to this weekendforever.
I find a seat at an empty cocktail table off at the side of the dance floor and sit down, my legs feelingweak.
Sorry for lying to you, Kristen. I haven’t had too much champagne. It’s somethingelse.
I close my eyes and rub my forehead, then look up when I sense someone walking toward me. It’s Liam, with his hands in his pockets and a small smile on his face. I pat the seat next to me and grab the back, sliding it out for him to sitdown.
“Hey,” he says as he sits. Despite my sadness, seeing him still puts a smile on myface.
“Hey.”
He clears his throat, looking out over the crowd of people. Something pulls at my heart as he looks back over atme.
“We need to talk,” he says, taking my hands in his. “I don’t want this to just be a fling. I have feelings for you, and I want us to explorethis.”
“Oh. I wasn’t expecting this.” I shift in my seat. “How do you know you don’t want this to be a fling? We haven’t even…youknow.”
“That’s how I know, Katherine. If I’d wanted this to be a fling, I wouldn’t have helped you out of the cab on Friday. I would have jumped in there with you and told the driver to take us to the nearesthotel.”
I smile and feel myself blush, feeling tingly allover.
“Liam, I don’t know if I can do this,” I whisper, my eyes finding his. “I’m not right for you. You want things that I just can’t give you, not now at least. Me, getting married? I’m too young. And kids? I would love to have kids. I’ve always imagined having a big family, but I also want acareer.”
“I know, Katherine, I get it.” He reaches out, taking my hands in his. “Believe me, I definitely getit.”
“This has been the best thing that’s ever happened to me, but I don’t think I can give you what you’re lookingfor.”
“Katherine, I’ve always wanted a second chance at love. I love my son more than anything, and you know what? I’ve never seriously considered starting over with a woman before you. It’s aways been in the back of my mind, but it never felt like the right time to pull the trigger. What your dad said is right. I have been basically single for over 20 years. I haven’t wanted to settle down. I never met the right person. But now I have. It’s you. We can see if this is right before we tell your parents. We can do everything at your pace — not just being together, but the way we tell people. All I know is that what we have doesn’t just come along every day. I had two decades for something like this to fall into my lap, and it never did. But you know what, Katherine? Now it has. This is a rare, special thing that we have. I know you feel ittoo.”
“I do,” Iwhisper.
“Listen,” he says, pulling out his wallet and grabbing a business card from it. He gives it to me and I turn it over, the white card feeling heavy in my hands. It lists the contact information for his office — the same office I always went to when I was a kid and my dad brought me to work with him — and scrawled on the other side is an address. “You don’t have to decide right now. After everything dies down, get a cab to this address. It’s a five minute ride. I’ll bethere.”
“Your cabin?” she says, glancing from the card to hiseyes.
