Page 59 of Scot of Deception
No, no, he couldn’t stay. It would be best for everyone if he simply left. Clan Stewart had plenty of good men, according to the laird, so his presence wouldn’t be missed.
“I have tae leave,” Blaine insisted after a moment of silence. He didn’t trust himself in the same place as Kathleen, not after agreeing to the laird’s plan and sneaking into her chambers like that, only to once again bed her. There had to be something terribly wrong with him if he couldn’t control himself at all around her, and that was precisely why he had to leave, why they could never cross paths again “I have tae. An’ I’ll be fine, me laird. I’ve been workin’ as a hired swordfer over a decade, I ken how tae take care o’ meself. I’ll go through the woods. They willnae find me.”
Laird Stewart shook his head with a heavy sigh, running a hand through his graying hair. “I dinnae think it’s a good idea. And I would be grateful tae have ye among me men. But I cannae stop ye, can I?”
Blaine mirrored the movement, shaking his own head. “Nay. I’m sorry.”
“Nay even if I bribe ye?” asked the laird with a playful smirk.
Blaine huffed out a short laugh. “I’m afraid nae this time,” he said. “But any other time, I would have taken ye up on yer offer.”
“This is because o’ Bran, is it nae?”
“It’s because o’ Kathleen,” said Blaine and admitting it out loud was as painful as swallowing a handful of glass, the words scraping against his throat. “She daesnae wish tae be near me, an’ I understand that.”
“She told ye that?”
“Och aye, she did.”
Laird Stewart hummed thoughtfully, scratching the back of his head idly as he leaned back to stare at the ceiling.
“Well, I’m sorry fer that,” Laird Stewart said. “I truly thought ye could resolve this.”
“I dinnae think there is anythin’ tae resolve,” Blaine admitted with a small shrug, trying to look nonchalant even as the knot in his throat grew and grew with every word he spoke. “She has every right tae never wish tae see me again after I betrayed her trust. That was what I should have expected. An’ besides, her faither would never allow us tae be together, so in the end, I suppose it truly daesnae matter.”
Laird Stewart listened to him carefully, nodding along. For a while, they were both silent, and Blaine wasn’t surprised. What was there for anyone to say? There were no words of comfort that would help.
“Alright,” said Laird Stewart as he pushed his chair back and stood. Blaine did the same, shooting up to his feet, and following the laird out of his study as he made his way to the door. “It’s yer decision. I shall have the maids pack ye some food tae take with ye.”
“Ye truly dinnae have tae dae that,” Blaine assured him. “I’ll be fine. I’ll find a village along the way an’—”
“Nonsense,” said Laird Stewart, waving a hand dismissively. “It’s nay trouble. It will only take a few minutes.”
There was no defying the laird’s will, and so Blaine followed him from his study down to the kitchens, where the cooks and the maids were rushing around, preparing for that night’s dinner. He lingered by the door as Laird Stewart spoke to one of the cooks, asking for a bundle of cheese, dried meats, and fruits for Blaine to take with him on his journey, and once everything was packed, one of the maids handed the small parcel to him.
“Take care on yer journey,” said Laird Stewart. “Where will ye go now?”
“I dinnae ken,” Blaine admitted.
“God be with ye wherever ye are.”
“Thank ye, me laird,” said Blaine, bowing to him one last time. “Fer everythin’. And I wish you all the best fer Mistress Fenella’s wedding.”
“She is rather unhappy right now, but her betrothed is a good, kind man and I believe they have much in common. I think in time she will come to accept him and be happy, but it isnae easy fer a faither tae watch their child suffering. Which is why I understand Bran’s pain tae a degree… But I wish ye the best of luck.” He patted the younger man’s back.
Blaine left, heading back to the courtyard from the kitchens. He had only just managed to reach the main entrance, though, when he saw none other than Lady Ilyssa in his path, who upon spotting him, immediately made her way to him.
There was no avoiding her, no matter how much Blaine wished he could. Instead of trying to run away, which would only make him look ridiculous, he remained rooted on the spot.
Soon enough, his hopes were shattered when she came to a halt in front of him, but there was none of the anger Blaine had expected to see in her expression. Her gaze was serious, calculating, even, but the fury he had seen in her when he and Kathleen had been caught was there no longer.
“Me lady,” Blaine said, bowing to her as was custom. “Is there somethin’ ye require o’ me? I am leavin’, as ye can see.”
He hoped that would be enough to get him out of whatever trouble he had unwittingly found himself in, but Lady Ilyssa didn’t seem to be in any hurry herself.
“I came tae tell ye that I dinnae blame ye,” she said, and the surprise of hearing this was staggering. How could she claim she didn’t blame him? How could she not be furious with him after what he had done to her daughter? The lady, more than anyone, surely understood the importance of a good marriage, and she also understood that now all chances of that were destroyed for Kathleen.
Blaine must have looked like a fool, staring at her with his eyes comically wide and his mouth hanging open. Ilyssa chuckled, her hand reaching out to pat his shoulder reassuringly.
