Page 88 of Ruthless King
Tony: It’s not looking good boss. The shithead is trying to take out another loan with the Red Dragons to cover what he owes you.
Merda. Of course, Liam McKenzie would try to find an easy way out. Owing the Red Dragons will only put Stella right back in the thick of it.
Me: Go to Jianjun and tell him to refuse. Under no circumstances is he to make a deal with him and spread the word around the city. No one is to give Liam McKenzie a loan, or they’ll have to deal with me.
Tony: Got it,capo.
Fuck, why can’t it just be easy for once? I stomp to the refrigerator and grab a beer. It’s only noon, but I have a feeling I’ll need it to get through today. Glancing at my phone again, I stare at the string of texts from Dante.
Mycoglioneof a brother isn’t taking no for an answer. He’s insisting on apologizing to Stella, and I don’t want him anywhere near her. Not now. Not when everything between us is so new and up in the air.
And perfect.
Not perfect, I remind myself as I press my palm to my heart. How many more times can I fuck her with my shirt on before she sees my tattoo? It’s not just the sex, sleeping together complicates things further. I like to sleep naked, or with boxers at most. Falling asleep with a t-shirt every night feels suffocating.
Dark memories surface, the ones I’ve tried for years to forget. Pinned to the mattress. Shirt over my head. Trying to scream but my words are muffled by the fucking pillow.
I’d known getting initiated into the mob as a teen was going to be hell, but I’d never expected that. Or the rest of it. I squeeze my eyes shut, driving back the pain. After that day, I’d vowed never to be weak again.
And that’s how I became the King.
I chug down a long gulp from the bottle, the bubbles going straight to my head and pushing away the grisly memories. I’d been tortured, beaten, and nearly raped. But somehow, I survived.
Now I’d focus all that anger, that rage, on protecting Stella. I’d never let anyone hurt her again.Unless she gets hurt because of you. That dark voice echoes through my mind, and fear’s claws dig into my heart.
The sound of laughter drags me from the darkness and into the light of Stella’s smile. She walks toward me, grinning so big my breath catches. She must still be talking to Rose. I lower the bottle of Peroni onto the countertop and wrap my arms around her middle. She giggles as I nuzzle her ear.
“Okay, Rose, I gotta go,” she rasps out between fits of laughter as I dig my fingers into her sides.
“Remember, no hot Italian babies!” Her friend’s warning reaches my ears before Stella ends the call.
Her cheeks flame as I regard her. “No babies, huh?”
“Not yet,” she squeals. Then the enticing crimson hue only intensifies. “I mean, I wasn’t saying we’d ever have babies … I just mean—”
I cut off her adorable ramblings with my mouth. The sick thing is nothing would make me happier than having a part of me growing inside her. To see her belly full with my child. The momentary joy is smothered by gut-wrenching fear. It’s the number one reason for all my rules. It keeps everyone at a distance. If I don’t care about anyone, I have nothing to lose.
And now with Stella, I have so fucking much to lose the terror is paralyzing.
She pulls back, eyes locked to mine. “Are you okay? You just went stiff on me.” She reaches between us and cups my dick. “And I don’t mean in the good way.” A flirty smile flashes across that gorgeous mouth, and it settles the growing unease.
When I don’t say anything for another long moment, Stella’s hand envelops mine and she drags me to the couch. She pushes me down then crawls into my lap. The crushing pressure in my chest starts to relent.
“Tell me what’s wrong.” Her soft hand cups my cheek, and I’m filled with the most overwhelming desire to spill my darkest sins.
“You’ve often asked about my rules…,” I begin.
Her lips purse, and something like fear flashes across the tranquil sea of blue.
“There are reasons for them.”
She nods hesitantly.
“With the life I lead, love is weakness. Caring for anyone, sharing a life with someone, it only paints a target on their back.” I pause and draw in a breath. “It’s why I moved Ma outside the city, and I keep her far from the spotlight. And it’s why I’ve always insisted on casual relationships. Ultimately, I inevitably hurt everyone around me, Stella. I closed off my heart so many years ago to keep the ones I love safe.”
She shakes her head, tears welling in her eyes. Her hand slides off my cheek and rests over my heart. Directly over the date of Vinny’s death.Dio, the guilt will drag me under if I don’t admit the truth soon.
“You worry so much about others—who is there to take care of you?”
