Page 31 of Words I Couldn't Say
Ever since my first reading of the book, I’d identified with Trevor. As much as it had hurt to do so, I was the one who’d caused our separation. But who was I to Tucker? Trevor or Abigail? I was pretty sure which one, which led me to my next question. What did all of it mean?
“Care for some company?”
I turned and saw my mom carrying two glasses and a bottle of wine. “I would never say no to wine time with my mom,” I said, gratefully accepting a glass and taking a refreshing sip. “After a long day spent in the airport, this is exactly what I need.”
“We’re happy you’re home, honey,” she told me.
“It’s good to be home,” I answered honestly. Then I cast a glimpse to Tucker’s house, wondering if he still occupied the same room or if he’d moved into the master suite.
“For what it’s worth, he’s missed you.” My mother was always perceptive, and she could read me like an open book any day of the week.
“I’ve missed him, too.” My voice was a whisper, barely audible in the cool night air.
She took a drink of her wine before turning to give me a pointed look. “I figured you did. The question is: What are you going to do about it?”
“I have no freaking clue.”
She chuckled softly. “You’ll figure it out, I’m sure. I’ll never forget the day that light bulb in your brain clicked on and you realized your feelings for him. You were so brave, marching right up to him at prom and kissing him, not knowing if he felt the same.”
“I’m not that girl anymore, Mom. And he’s not that boy. So much has changed.”
“You may not be that girl, but that doesn’t change the way you feel. You’ve both grown up. Perhaps the time apart was exactly what you needed. While it broke his heart, I believe you did the right thing back then,” she said, surprising the hell out of me.
At the time, my parents had remained neutral over our breakup. Neither one of them had told me that I was doing the wrong thing. On the flip side, they also hadn’t told me that I was doing the right thing. I had no idea what they’d thought, and they hadn’t given me any clue. So her saying that astounded me.
“You do?”
She set her glass down and twisted on her chair. “Ava, you were never meant to stay here in Cincinnati. Your dad and I knew you were destined for bigger and brighter things. There’s nothing wrong with that. What happened to the Mannings was a tragedy. Tucker’s staying behind to take care of Tanner was selfless, respectable, and I agree that it was the right thing to do. It wasn’t your time back then. Even if you had stayed, he’d be raising his brother. You’d end up resentful that you weren’t in Hollywood. What matters most is you’re here now. Tanner’s graduated and nothing is stopping you from being together if that’s what you want.”
“You make it sound so easy, Mom. Of course it’s what I want. Every single time I’ve gotten a part, no matter how big or small, Tucker was always the first person I wanted to tell. I love living my dream. I hate doing it without him.”
“Who says you have to?”
Before I can respond, we were joined by Aunt Lexi.
“I wondered where you two escaped to. I swear, between your kids and mine, you’d think our parents raised a couple of wild children.”
Mom laughed and topped off the glass of wine Aunt Lexi had clutched in her fingers. “For mine, I blame the Banks gene pool. But we’ll let the men deal with them for a while. It’s time for girl talk. What’s new in California? Are you seeing anyone? Have you met Leo?”
It wasn’t surprising that she’d asked about Leo. While the studio had gone with me, a small player in the realm of Hollywood, they’d pulled out all the stops when casting for Trevor. Leo Lockwood was highly sought after. He was currently out of the country, filming some upcoming thriller, and we hadn’t had a chance to meet yet. The studio planned on moving forward and shooting all scenes without him until he could settle in Cincinnati. To be honest, I was somewhat grateful for that. I’d worked with some incredible actors over the past five years, but none with as much acclaim as Leo had. I was more nervous than I’d ever been in my life, and I’d hoped that already being in the groove of filming by the time he showed up would calm my nerves. At the same time, I was thrilled to be working with someone of his caliber. I just hoped I did him justice. Heck, I hoped I did Tucker and Abigail justice. If not, Tawni would make good on her promise and hunt me down.
“I’m not seeing anyone. And I haven’t met Leo yet, but we’re supposed to be at a table read next week as long as his current project finishes filming on time.”
“She still has her eye on a certain boy-next-door,” Mom interjects, informing her sister.
“Mother!” I squealed, surprised she’d put it out there so nonchalantly.
“It’s okay, dear. We all saw you two earlier. It was pretty obvious nothing has changed between you and Tucker.” Aunt Lexi leaned in close. “And I’m glad. I always thought you two were perfect for each other. Just like your parents.”
I rolled my eyes. “That’s what got me into this. I never thought I wanted to be just like them. At least not right out of high school. God, I was so wrong,” I lamented. “I was such an idiot, leaving him the way I did. How can he ever trust me again? What if too much time has passed for us to get back to where we were?”
Aunt Lexi smiles wistfully. “Time apart can be ideal for a relationship, Ava. Just because it didn’t work out in the beginning doesn’t mean it’s doomed to ultimately fail.”
I swallowed hard as I wondered if she was right.
“And there’s no reason you have to get back to where you were. You have to start in the here and now, the present, and your relationship can grow from there.”
“Do you really think that’s possible?” I asked.
