Page 102 of Conception
“Trust me, Amelia,” I say, lifting up the bundle of joy in my arms, “when she finds out who you are and the gift you’ve given her, she’ll be overwhelmed with joy.”
She doesn’t look convinced, but when she does meet Mom, it’ll take two seconds tops for her to realize that Kate Wellington is a force to be reckoned with and she loves freaking hard. Fuck, I can’t imagine the conversation I’m going to have with her about this. The question is: Do I call or drive home to spill the news? Call. Definitely call. I’m not leaving Amelia for a single second until we have this all worked out.
“So, since your dad received my letter, do you know what happened to it? Did they throw it out? Please tell me they threw it out.”
“Wish I could. I’m pretty sure Mom tucked it away into the safe at home in case he got another one. If a pattern was established, she wanted all the evidence. Hell, I’m going to have to call Mom. This is going to blow her mind. And now I’m definitely curious what you wrote.”
She nibbles on her lower lip. “It was pretty cut and dried. I wrote about seventeen drafts before I decided to keep it short and sweet. I didn’t want to seem like I needed you. I didn’t want to be seen as an obligation. Just…a quick ‘Hey, remember all those times we banged? Yeah, ya knocked me up.’”
“Cold,” I mutter, half joking, half not. “Thought you said you poured your heart out?”
She winces as her cheeks flush a deeper pink. “I know, I know. So maybe I embellished. But I did throw in an ‘I miss you.’ I’m sure I did.” She taps her forefinger on the edge of her chin. “And then I ended it with ‘If you want, you know where to find me,’” she says. “I suppose that wouldn’t have clued them on to this having anything to do with you. Oh god, what are they going to think of me?”
Even if I hadn’t told mom about Amelia before I left, I still know how she’ll be received. “They’re going to love you. They’re going to love Branson.”
Something crosses her face. “Even if he isn’t a Knox?” she asks quietly.
“It’s not even part of the equation, babe. It’s just a name. I promise. And when you’re feeling up to it, I can’t wait to hear how his name came to be.”
“We have a lot to discuss, don’t we?”
“Yeah, babe. I’d say we do. Good thing is we have all the time in the world.”
Where this sudden patience is coming from, I have no idea. Probably from the baby sleeping in the crook of my arm, and I send up a prayer of thanks that I had the best example of a father a guy could have.
She yawns, takes a glance at the sleeping baby in my arms, then settles in against her pillow. As much as I don’t want this conversation to end, I can tell she needs her sleep.
“Why don’t you get some rest? I can handle this little guy for a while,” I offer. To be honest, I wouldn’t mind a few moments alone with him and my thoughts to process it all.
“I should call the nurse. They can take him to the nursery. Get one last night of peace, quiet, and undisturbed sleep while I can. As much as I love her, there’s no way I can live with Sunny watching over my shoulder the way she’s tried to do for the last few months. The first thing I’m doing when I get home is kick her out.”
“Amelia, you don’t have to do this alone.” I shake my head. “No, you’renotdoing this alone. I’m here and I’m not going anywhere. Ever again.”
Tired, green eyes stare back into my own defiant ones. “It’s a nice sentiment, Knox. It really is. But you don’t have to do this, either. You don’t have to stay. I won’t force you to do anything you don’t want to. It’s not the fifties. No one’s holding a shotgun to your head. And you’re probably not thinking straight after getting the shock of a lifetime.”
“I’m not leaving, Amelia. I’m never leaving you or him.”
“Knox.” Her voice is a soft whisper of protest that I’m dying to drown out. “Your life is in Nashville. Not here. Not with us.”
“He’s my son. My life is where he is.” The conviction in my head and my heart doesn’t even surprise me. It’s a no-brainer. I should’ve stayed before. Or demanded Amelia come with me. Now that there’s both of them to consider, I’ll stay here forever if I have to. My future’s irrevocably changed and I don’t give a damn. I reaffirm my stance. “He’s my son.”
Three simple words I never expected to utter so soon in my life and one sentiment that makes my heart swell three times its size.
“And me?” she whispers. “What am I?”
I can’t believe she has the audacity to ask. But then I have to remind myself that I walked away. That she let me. That this is something neither of us dreamed up, yet now that it’s reality, I can’t imagine anything more. She has no idea I’ve been replaying every moment of our summer together since the night I left.
“You’re all you’ve ever been since the moment I first laid eyes on that pretty scowl and perfect tits.”
Her eyes flash, but she remains silent.
“What are you, Amelia? You’re fucking mine.”
“You’re wrong,” she snaps, eliciting a possessive growl from me. “I was yours once, Knox. You let me go and didn’t look back.
If it weren’t for the bundle in my arms, I’d fling my arms wide. “I didn’t look back because I didn’t have to! You were all I ever saw. In front of, behind, beside, on top of,beneathme. You were always there, even when my eyes were closed.” It’s on the tip of my tongue to drill into her by any means necessary that it wasn’t so cut and dried. But she’s just had my son, and the last thing I want to do is push her away before I win her back again.
“You’re right. It wasn’t just you.Welet go. I thought I was strong enough to handle it. Now? I don’t even know what I am or what I’m doing.”
