Page 98 of Conception
Mommy.
Congratulations. The nurse’s words echo in my mind.
Congratulations.
Sleepless nights.
The first one’s the hardest.
They’re mine.
He’s mine.
I have a fucking son.
I’m a fucking dad.
I’m rocked to my core.
He’smy son.
“Knox.”
Amelia’s soft voice brings me back to Earth. My heart hammers as I slowly look from the floor to her. The baby’s nestled against her chest, little lips, the tiniest I’ve ever seen, suckling at her breast.
I stumble and fall back into the chair.
A throat clears. The nurse watches me with curious eyes, a tiny smile playing at her lips. When she flicks her gaze to Amelia, she takes her cue at Amelia’s nod.
“Thank you, Jenny,” Amelia says. “We’ll be fine.”
“Of course. Whenever little Branson here is ready to go back to the nursery, just ring the button.”
And just like that, the sudden euphoria I’m feeling comes crashing down.
It’s like I was playing my favorite record only to have it scratch and suddenly stop right at the glorified drum solo.
The door shuts and silence hangs in the air between us. Amelia watches me. I watch the baby.
My son.
Branson.
All the joy of having a son is overshadowed for the briefest of moments. I’m a dick, but with the shock of both his…existence and then his name, I can’t help myself.
“This wasn’t the way it supposed to happen. This wasn’t what I wanted.” I’m mumbling more to myself, but with Amelia’s gasp, I know she heard. And that makes me wince.
Dear mouth, insert foot, ’cause I’m a jackass.
Her eyes flash with both anger and torment. Her jaw clenches, and with her teeth gritted, she gives me an arctic stare. It’s a sight. My son suckling at her breast while she’s shooting daggers at me. It’s the most inappropriate time, but my cock twitches.
Until she opens her mouth.
“Then you can leave, Knox. I didn’t ask you to come here. I’m not asking you to stay.”
It’s almost enough to make me laugh. As if I’m fucking going anywhere. Oh, no. Amelia just earned herself a fucking shadow for life.
“No. That’s not that what I meant. It came out wrong.” I run a hand through my hair, still reeling.
