Page 51 of Waiting for the Rancher
He hesitated. Then he shook his head. “I don’t know.”
The uncertainty was as bad as if he’d outright told her no, because obviously he didn’t care about her enough to fight for her—for them—and for whatever this was that had started to develop. If he was willing to let her go so easily for a second time, then she didn’t want him.
“You pushed me aside after our first kiss.” The heat began to sting the backs of her eyes, but she didn’t want to cry around him, didn’t want him to see how much his rejection was hurting her. “Now you’re pushing me away after our second.”
“I didn’t mean to kiss you either time.”
“Oh, so kissing me both times was a mistake?” She couldn’t stop the anger from swelling now too.
“I shouldn’t have done it—”
“Then why did you?”
He didn’t answer.
She wanted to stomp her foot and demand an answer. But she knew Maverick all too well, and she guessed he truly didn’t have an answer and was as confused by everything that had transpired between them as she was.
At the rattle of a wagon on the lane that led to the house, she guessed Tanner was coming.
She took a step back, the anger already dispersing inside her. She never had been able to stay frustrated at Maverick for long. Instead, the pain pushed in and swamped her.
“Fine, Maverick,” she whispered so that her voice wouldn’t crack. “You can push me away again. But next time you feel attraction surfacing, please just leave me alone. I won’t be interested.”
She spun and stalked out of his room. She closed herself in her bedroom and tossed herself onto her bed before she let the tears flow silently.
It wasn’t long before she heard Tanner’s voice call out from the entryway below. But she didn’t get up, didn’t want to see him, and most certainly didn’t want to say goodbye to Maverick.
When, a short while later, the heavy steps and thump of a cane told her that Tanner was helping Maverick leave, she swiped at her cheeks and held her breath as he drew near her door.
She wanted him to stop and tell her that he’d been wrong, that he needed to be with her. But his footsteps didn’t hesitate as he shuffled past. Instead, he was soon descending the stairs and in the front hallway and then out the door.
A few minutes later, the wagon wheels began to rumble down the lane away from the house. Only then did she bury her face in her pillow and let the sobs come.
The relationship that had started to bloom between her and Maverick was over before it’d had a chance to grow. Now it neverwould. Not after he’d trampled it into the ground right alongside her heart.
19
The knocking on Hazel’s bedroom door was persistent, rousing her from her melancholy.
“It’s me, Sterling,” a muffled voice said from the hallway.
“I’m not feeling well.” She responded with the answer she’d been giving to everyone who’d come to check on her.
She’d been miserable since Maverick left two days ago. That day she’d tried to keep herself busy with chores and helping with the livestock. By the next morning, however, she’d been too distraught and hadn’t gotten out of bed. This morning she’d done the same and stayed under her covers.
Mother and Scarlet had been doting on her, even though she’d assured them they had nothing to worry about, that her ailment wasn’t serious. Jo-Jo had been in and out of the room too, trying to get her eating and drinking.
But Hazel didn’t have an appetite, and all she wanted to do was sleep—and forget about Maverick.
“Can I come in?” Sterling asked through the door.
“No, not right now.” She wasn’t in the mood to see anyone, much less Sterling. He was always perceptive and would see that her sickness had more to do with her inner turmoil than a physical condition.
She pressed a hand against her nightgown and her chest to the empty cavity deep inside. She’d never known that rejection could rip her apart so thoroughly and leave her so devastated. Or maybe she’d felt everything so keenly because it was Maverick, and she loved him more than anything or anyone else in her life.
Tears stung her eyes, but instead of shedding them again, she blinked them back. She’d already cried enough over Maverick, and he didn’t deserve any more of her tears.
With the silence outside the door, she released a tight breath.
