Page 36 of Never Have We Ever
The suite wasn’t anything special. It looked more like (an upscale, of course) bachelor pad used more for efficiency than relaxing. Valeska doubted that her husband was trying to save money. More likely, he either spent most of his time in here sleeping and the rest of his day going out and taking care ofbusiness. His family had a satellite office here in Monaco. It wasn’t beyond comprehension that he would ride out his wife’s storm by hanging out in the only other Francophone office his family employed. Hell, tax wise, the suite could be a write off.
“Sorry about the mess.” André stacked some magazines on a table and kicked his dirty laundry into a corner. “I wasn’t expecting company.”
“I’myour wife. It’s hardly the worst I’ve seen.”
He scratched his head. “Are you? My wife, that is.”
Right in the heart, André.“That’s what I want to talk to you about. I think we’ve had a big, massive miscommunication over these past few years.”
André sighed. “It’s my fault. I should have told you these things in ways you better understood. I thought I was being romantic while helping you withyour French by writing those letters like that. I think I got too carried away. You couldn’t understand.”
“When my French did get better, I have to admit that your metaphors still went over my head. I don’t think I could have interpreted passages about the leaning tower of Pisa as anything but you talking about sightseeing.”
He still blushed. “I thought of it as like a game. Whatever I wrote,I wasn’t sure if you would understand it. So I could really tell you about my feelings and not be too embarrassed. Yet I didn’t think you would misunderstand so much, and I never thought to tell you these things when we were together. I was too busy talking about other things.”
“You really love me so much, André?”
“I didn’t know what love truly was until I first saw you, Leska. I told you onour wedding night that I wanted to treat things with you differently. I wanted to build up a relationship before making love for the first time. I wanted to make sure there was something to be felt besides physical pleasure. Ah, I’m such a fool…”
“I want to know what was really going on with Lena. Because those photos were damning, André.”
“Yes. I suppose so, but I was so shocked by your accusationthat I couldn’t think of how to explain myself. Because everything I had to say spoiled the surprise.”
“You mean the one you mentioned in your letter?”
“Of course. Lena was the only other one who knew about it, because I consulted her on how best to go about it. Besides maybe your mother, she was the only one who knew you as well as I did, but I did not trust my instincts like I should have.”
“What was the surprise?”
André sat on the edge of the bed. “I was going to buy us a small apartment here in Monaco. Not just for me to use when I had to come here for business, but forusto use as a getaway from Paris. No kids or nannies allowed. It was going to be our present to ourselves for enjoying almost ten years of knowing one another. All I could think about was coming home to findingyou here relaxing and ready for me to kiss you.”
“Like you practiced kissing on Lena?”
“That was not a kiss! I only ever gave her the kiss of greeting. Since meeting you, Leska, you are the only woman I feel anything sexual toward. I rarely think of my past lovers. They are nothing compared to you.”
“You’re still not explaining yourself well. Cut the dramatics and be straightforward.”
Andrésighed. “I admit that I overstepped my bounds with the nanny many times. Butnotlike that. I mean I was not professional enough. I saw how friendly you were with her and decided that I should be too. She was my employee, though. I remember we decided that the payments would come from my side so you would feel freer to be her friend and she could be your confidant. It was important to me thatyou felt comfortable around the woman helping you with our children.”
“But?”
“But I lost track of that! I swear upon my soul, Valeska, I never put her in a position like the one you’re thinking. She has never been anything but loyal to you and our family. Yet I can see how you might have thought otherwise. Because I was too friendly with her and then tried to do a secret project… it looked likewe were having an affair.”
“She’s not the only one I worried about,” Valeska confided. “There were many instances of you being intimate with coworkers and your professional contacts.”
“Intimate? You meanla bise?Because it is only me being polite. I never kiss another person like I kiss you.”
I dunno, those photos of you with that woman in Copenhagen are pretty damning.Yet it could’ve beenthe angle. The lighting. It could’ve been a friendly kiss to the cheek like this French idiot was famous for. Valeska was more than knowledgeable enough about French culture to know that exchanging those kisses was as common as waving hello or goodbye.
But it was a bit different when her husband did it.
“I never thought of myself as a paranoid person,” Valeska said, “until these past coupleof years.”
“Perhaps it’s common with a woman in your position.”
“How do you mean?”
He shrugged. “You have been a stay at home wife with my children for several years. Things have happened.” André glanced at her midsection. It was neither judgment nor adoration in his eyes. “It leaves much time for the imagination to blossom and for me to send the wrong signals. That’s one reason I wanted togift you a getaway apartment. I remember when we briefly lived here in Monaco. To me, it was a happy time. Our daughter was bright and young, and you were still your old self. Ever since our son was born…”
