Page 59 of Games We Play
“No,” Sloan was quick to agree. “I wouldn’t.”
“Good!” That extra pep to Leah’s voice was unexpected, but could Sloan say she wasn’t in the mood to hear some genuine pep right now? “What else about my picture did you like?”
Sloan pulled her legs up to her chest and wrapped her arm around her knees. “Now you’re fishing for compliments? Do I not give you enough?”
“Some women live off food. I live off compliments.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.” Didn’t stop Leah from eating around Sloan, though. Not that it was a problem. One of the best date ideas was eating. If all else failed, Sloan could suggest a restaurant, and any woman she was with would be excited to sit down and order the best meal off the menu, calories be damned.
Before Sloan could say anything else – like why she was suddenly compelled to call – Leah interrupted her thoughts. “Can I tell you something?”
Sloan pursed her lips in apprehension.“It depends,”she wanted to say.“Are you going to unload something on me? This is supposed to be flirty. If you’re going to bog me down with gal-pal stuff, then maybe we should hang up.”
“Sure.”
Leah sighed. “I had a bad day. Okay, so my whole day wasn’t so bad, but something happened when I was at the bookstore, and…” She laughed, uneasy. “Never mind. You don’t understand any of this. I shouldn’t have said anything.”
Hearing that self-flagellation in a woman’s voice was never satisfying. Hearing it from the woman currently sharing Sloan’s beds? Unacceptable. “No. Go ahead. Tell me about your day.” It was better than dwelling on her own day, as shitty as it had ended.
“You really want to hear that?”
“Sure. Indulge me.”
Leah rattled off the mundane: spilling coffee at breakfast, getting into work two minutes late but somehow making it past her boss’s eyes, and spending most of her afternoon giving herself carpal tunnel with her latest work project. Yet her tone didn’t change until she reached meeting up with her friend at the bookstore after work.
“I saw this guy there. I used to date him back in middle school. He was there with his kids. Two little kids. I only knew he had the one. Why did it make me feel so weird?”
Sloan said the first thing to come to her mind. “You used to date guys, huh?” She was under the impression that Leah had always known she was gay.
“I didn’t stop dating guys until I was in high school. Didn’t get a clue until then, I guess. Hormones make you do weird things.”
“So you saw a man – who was a boy back then – that you used to date years ago? It made you uncomfortable because he had kids?”
“I mean, I’m thirty. It’s weird to see people my age with kids now. Feels like everything I heard and read growing up begged me to never get pregnant until I was thirty-five and making millions.”
Sloan chuckled. “It doesn’t get much better at fortyandyou really do have millions. No matter what I do, there are journalists out there who make it their duty to write profiles about me. Specifically, they want the world to know that I’m a sad, meanspirited person who never learned real love because I didn’t give birth.”
“I don’t think giving birth makes you a more understanding person.”
Sloan flopped back against her pillow. “Good. Because I’ve never given birth. Maybe I was on the verge of losing that sense of my female self.”
“What does that mean?”
“I honestly have no clue. It’s been a long day for me as well.”
There was a pause. Then, “Care to tell me about it?”
No.Sloan wasn’t the type to verbally unload her woes. She purged them through physical activity. The gym, running, sex… they were different means to the same end. Only the gym required her trainer, running was best with her bodyguard, and sex… well, that was self-explanatory.Although I do feel more purged when I’m with you, Leah.She wasn’t sure if that was a bad or a good thing yet. It was certainly more dangerous than having no emotional attachment at all to the women she played with in the bedroom.
“My life is always stressful for some reason. Work, family…”
“You have family?”
“You make it sound like I was born from an abandoned egg and raised by wolves.”
“No… you never talk about them.”
“Well, to be fair, I haven’t talked to my parents in forever. We’re estranged.” She needed to explain herself, quickly. Otherwise, Leah would continue to pry, and Sloan would have to discuss matters she was never meant to reveal. “Suppose I meant my work family. I live a little too close to them, so it’s like I never leave the office.” Yeah, that was good. Sure. “I don’t want to talk about them, though. I’d much prefer to talk aboutyou,Leah. Did you know that I was feeling pretty down until I got your message?”
