Page 43 of Euphoria
He stilled, his breath hot against my cheek and his crotch hard against my thigh. “I am not a simple man, Jane. I can only give what I have to offer. This is what I have. It is all I have. I will not force you to take it, but I hope you will. I desire you above all else. In this, I am certain.”
“You offer me pleasure, enrichment, challenge…”
“I offer you my soul, Jane. All the parts of it I can give.”
I softened, my uncertainty fading.Be strong, Jane.Step out of the lie, and wear your wounds with pride.
“So we are clear,” I began slowly, my hands coming to rest on his shoulders. “This is a secret affair of the body and soul? And while this affair transpires, you and I shall have no other?”
“Yes,” he replied. “To all accounts. So, what say you, Jane?”
I already knew my answer. Knowing the parameters our liaison would take hadn’t done much to please me, but I was enamored with him. I was so deeply entangled that there was no way out. If I removed myself from his arms, it would be akin to death, but to remain… I might not have the entirety of his love, but it was better than the bleak horizon of nothing at all.
Foolishly, I dove into the ocean and drowned.
“Yes,” I said, bewitched, entranced, beguiled. “I agree.”
We kissed then, our tongues hungry as they twined around one another, our hands grasping for flesh. When he pulled away and carried me to the couch, his smile was a fine reward for my agreement. His lips set my body on fire once more, causing my wetness to grow, and I gave in to his expert ministrations.
As I reveled in his touch, I cast away my fears andsettled. A bargain had been struck, the contract signed, and where before had been a mere dalliance, now the affair had truly begun.
After his hands had stripped me of my clothes, his tongue dipped between my legs, and I was delivered to the same heights as the night before. His fingers inside me, my taste on his lips, his desire plain to see. I was his to do with as he wished. His slave. Edward gave me all the pleasure he was able to summon, and again, he took none for himself.
“You won’t let me please you?” I asked as he lay on the couch with me afterward. “You won’t take it from me?”
He shook his head, his hands roaming over my nakedness. His chest was bare, and the feel of his skin against my sensitive breasts was heaven.
“Why?”
“Shh,” he crooned. “Let me look at you.”
“But…”
“Jane, you fret too much,” he muttered, his jaw brushing against the swell of my breast. “Your mind is keen, and sometimes, it is too sharp. Be still.”
“Who will relieve your agony?” I asked.
“You will,” he whispered. “Soon. When I am inside you, it will be better than this. Away from them. Away from…” He stilled, his brow darkening, a storm cloud beginning to assemble on the horizon.
“You said some words in French to me today,” I murmured, attempting to turn the tide of conversation to smoother waters. “What did they mean?”
“Mon chèr maître,” he said. “The only master I’ve ever known.”
“And who is your master?” I asked, trembling against his chest.
His eyes drooped, some of his power seeming to fade. “I scarcely know.”
My heart swelled, and I buried my body closer to him, my hands wrapping around his waist. He was tormented by some demon, which was far beyond my understanding. I knew he would react badly if I pressed, such was his unpredictable nature, and I was too fearful to do a single thing that would alienate me from him, so I let him be.
Perhaps my closeness would soothe some of the sting his thoughts caused. If he needed help taming this unknown beast, he would come to me in time.
Who was I to claim ownership over his sorrow after two passionate nights in his arms? If I was a balm for his soul, then I was glad to apply myself.
“Rocky?” I asked, lifting my head so I could see him.
He mumbled something, his eyelids heavy with sleep.
“When you want me… Mercilessly…” I swallowed hard, my heart beginning to thrum wildly at my bold gesture. “I will be waiting.”
His hand slipped between my legs, his finger finding its way inside.
“I will have you, Jane.I will.”
