Page 29 of Zenith
As if the rope that had once bound us together had returned anew, he seemed to hear my plea and spoke.
“I want for nothing more than to take you in my arms, Jane,” he said his voice thick with emotion. “I want to lie with you and kiss your lips, and remain until you fall asleep. I never wish to leave. I want all those things I pledged to you the day I asked you to marry me.” He swallowed, betraying his welling tears. “All I want in this life is you, but I fear the truth I withheld is too terrible to forgive. I do not know what to do.”
A knock at the door interrupted his stream of consciousness, and Alice entered, wheeling in a tray. Smiling at me, she set a pitcher of water on the bedside table, then set the tray over my lap. A bowl of broth steamed before me, filling the room with the hearty smell of chicken.
“There,” she said. “This will fill you up and not disturb your throat too much.”
“Thank you, Alice,” Edward said, not looking at her.
Taking his words as a dismissal, she nodded and wheeled the trolley away, closing the door softly behind her. Knowing Alice, she was dying to ask a million questions and regale me with all the comings and goings of Thornfield I had missed. She was obviously pleased I had returned but distraught at the circumstances. Truthfully, despite her overzealous nature, I missed her a great deal, also.
As I had suspected, Edward remained until I had consumed the broth, fussing over me in a very un-Edward-like way. He did not speak again, and when he left, tray in hand, I closed my eyes and allowed sleep to claim me, too tired to ponder what had become of me. Fate had taken control of my life a long time ago, and it was time to stop fighting her.
I had no answers to offer myself, let alone Edward Rochester.
