Page 60 of Zenith
“Truly?”
“Truly.”
Her eyes sparkled with hope, and I smiled, my heart feeling lighter than it had in days. At that moment, I knew the chapter in my life labeled ‘Thornfield’ had snapped closed. Whatever I’d come here to witness had been seen in its entirety, and I was free of the spirits of this place once and for all.
Reaching for Alice’s hand, I murmured, “Let’s go.”
On the way back to the hospital, I was silent.
I thought long and hard, slotting together the last pieces of the puzzle that I was now referring to as the Thornfield affair. The story had begun long before I ever crossed its threshold, and the plot of destruction was already ten years in the making when Blanche Ingram happened upon it. It would have ended thus even without her hand stirring the storm.
Bertha had tried to burn down Thornfield once before, and who knew how many other attempts she’d made over the years. Perhaps she had wanted this all along, and the woman who wanted to destroy Edward and me had manipulated her despair. I was certain we were all pawns in a game that had no master.
It was a great deal of what ifs, and I no longer had the energy to think over them. Everything was gone, and so it had been done. The cycle was complete.
We could wallow in the pit of our misery, or we could break free of it and forge ahead into the light. Knowing we had remade our lives into something great would drive Blanche absolutely crazy. It was always the way with bullies and their jealousies.
I knew the kind of person I was, and now I knew Edward. Thornfield did not define us. We may be manipulated by people, our circumstances, our wealth and class, or even our upbringing, but once everything was stripped away and our souls lay bare, only we had the power to make the decision of who we truly were.
And who was I? I was Jane Eyre. Mistress of my own destiny.
* * *
When Alice returnedme to the hospital, Edward was awake.
“You went to see it, didn’t you?” he asked as I sat beside him.
I knew he was talking about the remains of Thornfield, and there was no use hiding it. He’d seen how badly the flames had consumed it.
“Yes.”
He’d been sleeping a great deal over the past few days, the treatments the doctors put him through for his burns were severe and drained his strength completely. I was glad to see him awake and alert and hoped it was a sign he was finally beginning to heal. I only wished I could say the same for his heart, for I knew he hurt gravely for not being able to save Bertha.
“It is a ruin,” he muttered. “It’s in the newspapers. All of it.”
I didn’t know what to say because it was true. There was nothing left. Instead, I took his hand in mine and edged closer to the bed.
“I have nothing, Jane,” he whispered, his voice ragged beyond compare. “Everything is gone. My company, my holdings, my fortune, Thornfield… It is all gone.”
“What do you mean?” I asked, tightening my grip on his hand. “Surely…”
“It was the only way to satisfy her,” he murmured. “I gambled it all, and she still won.”
“Blanche?” I asked, my mouth falling open. “You gave it all away to her, and she still…”
He nodded.
“You understand she was behind this? Bertha’s escape, the fire… This was her final move, and we played right into her hands. She did this to you, Edward. She tried to kill us all.”
“I know, Jane. I’m the greatest fool there ever was.”
“You’re not a fool.”
“It is not within me to take another’s life,” he went on. “That would have been the only way to stop her, and I knew it even as I gambled everything to avoid it. Perhaps Blanche could stoop that low, but you know I cannot. She bested me.”
I sighed, stroking my fingers across his knuckles. “It is not a failing to care for others, Edward. Even those you consider your enemies.”
“I have you, don’t I, Jane? You are well?”
