Page 56 of Crash
I tensed as I felt his hand begin to stroke lightly up and down my back.
“Is this okay?” he asked, his hand lowering little by little.
In my current position, a little lower would mean he would be touching me right between the legs.The danger zone.I tensed against him, and he stopped his movements.
“I haven’t… I’m not…” I couldn’t say it.
“You haven’t—”
“Not since…” I trailed off with a shrug. “I don’t know what to do. Not like—”
“Vee, it’s not always about the fucking,” he said, running his other hand over his face. “It’s nice and all but sometimes it’s about more than that.”
I closed my eyes tightly. “It is?”
“Being into the person you’re with has a lot to do with it being a-fucking-mazing.” His chest rose and fell as he sighed. “I always imagined it would be somethin’ else with the right woman.”
“I wouldn’t know.”
“You will know…” He paused and pressed his lips against the top of my head. “When the time is right.”
“Do we have time?” It was out of my mouth before I could swallow it back. “Because…Because I want to try.With you.”
There was silence for a moment, and my heartbeat began to pick up.
“Yeah,” he whispered. “We have time.”
We held onto each other for ages, his hand resuming its lazy stroking up and down my spine.He wanted to help me try.
“Do you remember when you used to come toBeatback in the day?” he asked.
“How could I forget?”A girl crushing hard on a guy.
“I used to think you were untouchable.”
“What do you mean?”He was the untouchable one.
“You were like that girl, you know. The one all the guys wanted. I never thought I’d have a chance with a girl like that.” He breathed deeply before saying, “A woman like you.”
I closed my eyes, burying tighter against his side. “I thought the same thing about you.”
“Really?”
“You and Dean were so different,” I whispered.
“That’s an understatement.”
I smiled, my lips brushing against his chest. “I know you’re identical…but I never looked at him.”
“Never?”
“Never.” It was one of the truest things I’d ever told him.
“All this time, huh?” he asked, and I couldn’t miss the note of pleasure in his voice. “Me too.”
Raising my head, I caught his gaze. “Really?”
“I think it’s pretty obvious by now,Vee,” he said, running a hand through my hair. His eyes lowered to my lips, and this time, I was the one who kissed him.
