Page 22 of Rush
I shook my head. “For as long as I can remember, it’s always been Hunter. I suppose that’s why this is so hard to swallow, you know? Why I feel so lost. Everything has changed…Everything.”
“Understandable.”
“What about you?” I asked. “Why are you single?”
“Who says I’m single?”
I felt heat prickle on my cheeks, and I lowered my head. “I, uh… I assumed… Letting me stay at your place seems dicey if you’re attached.”
“Jealous?” He chuckled, and I knew he was winding me up again.
I scowled and slapped him on the arm. “Tell me,” I demanded. “How are you single looking likethat?”
“I’ve never found anyone who could live up to…” He shrugged.
“Live up to what?”
“My idea of the perfect woman, I suppose.”
I snorted, trying not to laugh. Ryan Harper talking about his feelings? Had I fallen into the Twilight Zone?
“What about you?” he asked, turning my line of questioning back onto me. “You couldn’t have been happy with a guy like Hunter.”
“Fuck off.” I scowled. Hunter had been my dream guy. Rich, handsome, had a good job…But what about all the other things, a little voice inside me whispered.What about having a kind heart, a sense of humor, and depth beyond material wealth?
“You were always on and off again in high school. I assumed one day you would be off for good, not getting married.”
“If you hadn’t noticed, we are so off,” I scoffed.
Ryan grunted and grasped my hand. “Then why are you still wearing his ring?”
“It’s just habit. And it’s only been three days, so give me a fucking break.” I snatched my hand back and shoved it under the hem of my top. “That’s a Tiffany ring, just so you know.”
Ryan raised his eyebrows. “Am I supposed to be impressed?”
Realizing I was being a selfish, entitled bitch again, I frowned. Work in progress, indeed.
“Do you know what you need?” he declared, sitting up straight.
“Obviously not, but I assume you do.”
“Of course, I do. It’s easy for me to sit here and pick apart the places where you took the wrong turn. But I’m not you. You can’t see.”
“What makes you such a bloody expert?” I exclaimed, seriously pissed off. “I haven’t seen you in almost…”
“Ten years.” He raised an eyebrow.
“Ten years…” I trailed off as the realization began to sink in. I was twenty-eight years old, and I hadn’t really lived. I was twenty-eight, and I still didn’t know shit about the world, who I was, and what I really wanted.
“Forget about it, J,” he continued, placing his hand on my knee. “Let’s worry about right now.”
“Right now?”
“It’s clear you need to do something. Let your hair down, have some fun—”
I jerked away from him. “I am not having sex with you!”
“Bloody hell, Jade!” he exclaimed. “I’m talking about your bucket list, not your vagina.Shit.”
