Page 40 of Strike
“Will you be okay? Or do you want me to stay a little longer?” Macy asked.
“No,” I replied, shaking my head. “I’ll be okay.”
“Well, okay. Wake me if you need me.” She gave me one last hug and left, turning off the light as she went.
When I was alone again, I buried back underneath the covers and curled up into the fetal position. It had felt so real. The dream and the other bit… The heart thing. What a mess.
I fell back into a fitful sleep, unable to shake the awful tingling down my spine.
16
Storm
After a weekof staring at the walls in my apartment and showering with my arm wrapped in a plastic bag, I’d had just about enough.
Callie was everywhere I turned. She was the woman in the line in front of me at the supermarket. She was the woman I passed on the street. She was the woman inside a shop I passed. She was the woman at the gym. She was the woman in my dreams.
Fucking hell.
I’d messed up, and this time, despite trying my hardest, I cared. I actually cared, and to make matters worse, I didn’t know what to do about it. I couldn’t fight, I was limited to what I could do at the gym, I couldn’t ride my motorcycle, I couldn’t do anything. I’d even taken to avoiding Callie’s shop after I’d walked past the other day and saw a notice pinned to the window. The opening was in three weeks.
I was on my last legs. Grabbing my keys and jacket, I slammed the front door closed and strode out into the crisp autumn air. The sun was shining, but heavy gray clouds loomed in the distance. Throwing my coat on, I draped it over my left shoulder. I was still unable to wear it properly because of my cast and cursed every time it slid off.
Walking down Brunswick Street, I weaved through slow walkers and powered toward the city. When I reached Victoria Parade, instead of heading toward the CBD, I turned left. I walked and walked, not knowing where I was going, but my feet seemed to know the destination.
What was I supposed to do now? Losing Callie had hurt more than I knew it would, and everything after her seemed pointless. I couldn’t fight for at least another five weeks, I had no job prospects, no friends, no nothing. Where could I go? There was nobody who would listen to a washed-up arrogant son of a bitch like me. No one.
It took me the best part of an hour to walk from Fitzroy to Abbotsford. That was when I realized where my subconscious had led me. Pulse Fitness. My ex, Lori, worked there. I wasn’t sure if it was suffering from some kind of insane desperation or I was looking to prod at an open wound, but the death wish in me was strong today.
Pulse Fitness was like a mecca for fighters, but it was a heaven I was barred from. I wasn’t welcome here, and I knew it. I felt like I was knocking on the Pearly Gates, knowing the bouncers would come out at any moment and haul me back to the bowels of Hell where I belonged. Still, I was a moron in all senses of the word, so I stepped into the foyer.
I couldn’t go any further without a security tag, so I lingered like a desperate hanger-on. Staring through the window into the gym, I saw some familiar faces and curled my lip. Hamish fucking McBride was everywhere. He was going hard with some weights while in the background, I could see some fighters from the AUFC.
It was just another place I didn’t belong, and standing here made it even clearer. Mark Ryder, always on the outside looking in like a worthless piece of shit. They always told stories about your downfall but never about the bit that came after. The nothing.
I shouldn’t have come here.
Turning, I stumbled slightly as I came face-to-face with Lori Walker. The stunning, blue haired, tattooed knockout I was foolish enough to cheat on. And foolish enough to come and see.
She looked really good. Her hair was still her trademark shade of cobalt, and I wondered if all her towels were still stained. It looked cool, but the dye used to rub off on everything, not to mention the bottom of the shower. Her arms seemed more colorful than I remembered. Had she gotten more tattoos to add to her collection?
“What are you doing here?” she demanded, staring me right in the eye.
She was pissed and had every right to be. In a moment of desperation, I’d broken my promise, and my hole just got deeper and deeper.
When I didn’t reply, she rolled her eyes. “If you’re here for money, I don’t have any. And if you’re here for sex, you can forget about your balls because I’ve got a dozen fighters in there that’ll rip them off before you even get close.”
“No, it’s not like that…” I scowled and shook my head. Forever making mistakes. Turning, I muttered, “Forget about it.”
“Wait, Storm…”
“I shouldn’t have come here,” I said, reaching for the door.
“Storm.”
I glanced at Lori over my shoulder. I was such a bastard even when I was trying to do the right thing. I had nobody, and whose fault was that? Mine.
“What’s wrong?” Her gaze fell on my arm and back up again.
