Page 74 of The Devil's Tattoo
Every night, we had consuming sex. It was impossible not to sleep together without it resulting in wandering hands, and just thinking about it made me wet. Feeling him inside me, his touch all over, the wicked things he said… He had such a dirty mouth on him, and I was surprised at how turned on it made me feel. The way he spoke about the things he wanted to do awoke a beast I never thought I’d had inside me. And that Zoe wasinsatiable.
I found myself thinking about Melbourne. When we got back, I couldn’t wait to show him where I lived. I wanted to see his place, as well. I wanted to see what CDs he had in his collection and if he had any books. I wanted to see the pictures he hung on the wall. I wanted to knoweverything.
Abruptly, he jerked awake, pulling me out of my daydream. He looked disoriented for a moment, and I realized his phone must have vibrated in his pocket. Leaning my head against the back of the seat, I watched him as he pulled it out and stared at thescreen.
He looked surprised and then annoyed. I didn’t know what I was expecting, but it wasn’t that, and I instantly wondered who it was that had texted him. Something I never thought I’d be was a snoopy girlfriend, jealous of everything and everyone, but the emotion that spiked through me at that moment felt eerilysimilar.
Will closed his eyes and sighed before typing a reply. It was impossible to read his expression. I had no idea what he was thinking, and I wanted to ask, but I also didn’t want to be that girl. I had to learn to trustagain.
His phone seemed to vibrate again, and he looked at the screen, seemingly conflicted. Who wastextinghim?
When he looked over to me, I was glad I was wearing my sunnies, and he couldn’t tell if I was looking at him or not. I didn’t give myself away, watching his reaction. He frowned, hunching his shoulders forward and looked back at his phone before typing insomething.
I’d never before been one to be so jealous. Not like this. Except for the other night when he’d brushed off that girl, I hadn’t worried that there might be someone else. An ex-girlfriend. Someone he might have been seeing before the tour. I’d been so wrapped up in my own issues the thought hadn’t even crossedmymind.
What if he was getting texts from anotherwoman?
Worry settled in my stomach, making me feel sick, and the awkward Zoe was back just like magic. Will had shown me time and time again that I had nothing to worry about, but in reality, things might bedifferent.
An hour or so later, when we got out to stretch our legs at a roadhouse, Will seemed distant. Distracted. He’d been so open with me until now it wasunnerving.
“You okay?” I asked, standingbyhim.
He ran a hand over his face, scratching the stubble on his chin. “Yeah. It’s just… These long bus trips gettome.”
It sounded like a cover-up, but I let it slide. Today was my birthday, and for the first time in a long time, I intended to enjoy it, bus ornobus.
With a frown, I slid an arm around his waist, but he shrugged and began to walk away, my arm dropping back to my side. And just like that, I’d been brushedaside.
Frozen to the spot, I watched him walk back toward the bus, his lack of affection leaving me empty. It was such a turnaround from that morning it seemed to confirm the thoughts thatplaguedme.
Being on tour was another world. We all had a reality to go back to, and what if Will’s was to another woman? He’d been strung out the first few weeks, and then he’d suddenly become withdrawn after getting those texts. What if it was his reality calling? If all that was true, then what did thatmakeme?
A sucker for falling for it for one, but it also made me the other woman. The things I felt for Will were real, I had no doubt about it, and that was what made the uncertainty hurt more than anything. Maybe I was just hurting myself by jumping to conclusions? After all, he went to all that trouble getting me thatguitar.
But the little voice at the back of my mind wouldn’t quit. What if it had all been a lie? What if I was the bit ontheside?
And this was why I didn’t likebirthdays.
