Page 81 of The Devil's Tattoo
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Itried notto think about the gig as Dee and I got out of the taxi. Standing out the front of the venue sent sharp stabbing pain through my heart, and my handsshook.
“You okay?” Dee asked. “You look paler thanusual.”
I took a deep breath. “It’s justtonight.”
“Just tonight.” He slid a hand into mine and led me down the side street to thestagedoor.
Everyone was already there. Frank, Louie, and Sticks were loitering to the side of the stage. Dean, Chris, and Simone were hanging out at the merchandise table setting things up. There was no sign of Pete and Will, and I wasthankful.
Simone caught my eye and offered me a small smile, and Inodded.
Going backstage, I found a quiet corner and leaned against the wall. I could tell myself that I was trying to be strong and professional, but I wasn’t even fooling myself. I knew the moment I saw Will, I’d break, and I’d either cry or fly into ablindrage.
“Zoe.” A voice splintered through mythoughts.
Spinning around with a scowl, I saw Pete behind me, his hands jammed into the pockets of hishoodie.
“What?” I spat a little tooforcibly.
“Canwetalk?”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.” Talking was the last thing I wanted to do right now. Right now, I wanted to hurt someone just like Ihadbeen.
“Zoe, it’simportant.”
With an annoyed sigh, I led him back into a storage room so we wouldn’t be interrupted. This wasn’t going to be pleasant, and the last thing anyone needed was anaudience.
Slamming the door closed behind him, Isneered. “Talk.”
“He’s sorry,youknow.”
“Yeah, well, soamI.”
“Somehow, I don’t think you mean it thesameway.”
“What gave me away?” I asked, leaning back against ashelf.
“Zoe, there’s something you have to understand,” Pete began carefully. I didn’t like where this was goingalready.
“You told me she was the one who got away. Is he in lovewithher?”
“That’s not for metosay.”
“Then why the hell are you even talking to me?” I cried. “Explain it to me because right now, all you’re doing is sinking intheboot.”
“You need to let him talk toyou,Zoe.”
“Was he with her this whole time?” I asked thinly, holding back tears. When Pete frowned but didn’t respond, I let all my anger out. “Was he with her this whole time? I swear to God if you don’t answerme,Pete…”
“No, he wasn’t,” he said, holding a hand up to calm me. “That first gig he said he saw you at, things had only just ended with Mish. It was bad. Itdestroyedhim.”
“So I was just a rebound? Is that what this was?” I felt bile in the back of my throat.The things I’d said to him. I felt sick. He’d said he didn’t know how to handle how he felt about me. Suddenly, I realized it must’ve been because he still had feelings for Mish. This whole time, had he been in love withsomeoneelse?
“No, Zoe. They’re over. They were over before he even laid eyes on you. When he finally told me about you, I understood. He was getting better. Getting over it. Becauseofyou.”
“Somehow, I don’t believe you. If that were true, he wouldn’t have kissed her back.” Pete’s expression fell, and I knew what I’d just said was the truth. All those things he’d told me. That he didn’t want to hurt me, that he would do anything I asked of him… That I was his, and he was mine. They werealllies.
