Page 61 of Perfect Tragedy
“You’re wrong.”
“No, I’m not, and I won’t entertain a discussion about this further.”
“Excuse me?”
“Look, I’ve had a lot of time to get used to, the way things are now. You just found out. You think you can deal with this, but you can’t.”
“Don’t tell me what I can and can’t deal with. You’re not the only one that’s been through some hard things over the years.”
“I know. I wasn’t trying to disregard your feelings and your losses. And I’ve never gotten to tell you in person that I’m sorry about the loss of your mom.”
“Thank you, but that has nothing to do with anything right now.”
“No, but it needed to be said nevertheless.”
“Blake, we need to talk about this.”
“I can’t. Not right now. I need to get back to the house. Mandy and I are having a late dinner.”
“Blake,” I take a step toward him and reach out. He jerks away from my touch, making me freeze into place, hurt lancing my heart.
“I’ll talk to you later, okay?” he says and I can do nothing but watch him as he walks away from me while pain of a different kind enters my heart. Pain that he would think for one second that he’s not good enough for anyone, let alone me, takes my breath away.
Well, he’s about to get up close and personal with the woman I’ve become since he’s seen me last. I smile to myself, because he’s never going to know what hit him by the time I’m done. It’s way past time for things to finally work out for us. I refuse to lose him again. I barely survived it the first time.
14
It’s been two days since Blake walked away from me. I’ve gone to his house and pounded on the door demanding he talk to me, but he won’t answer. Maybe he wants me to believe he’s not there, but given his rental car is in the driveway, it’s a dead giveaway. I even got Jack to call him and then took the phone from him when he answered, but I just got a brusque, “Not right now, Sienna,” which was very frustrating.
It’s been a long day at work. I’ve participated in a couple meetings meant to motivate by brainstorming and collaborating with fellow practice managers. Normally they’re a great way to kick start a week and leave me feeling pumped up and motivated, but I’m struggling to hang onto any kind of positive feeling right now. Blake’s attitude and shutting me out is really messing with my head, not to mention my heart.
Focusing is difficult but I throw myself into my day and help train a new assistant, respond to emails, interact with patients, decide on a marketing strategy for the month, and work on organizing the upcoming team meeting among other things.
I’m grateful when the day finally comes to a close and decide before I go home to head by Blake’s once more but drive on by when I don’t see his rental car there. Not feeling like going home, I decide to make a stop on my way and swing into Vanessa’s driveway.
She and her little family don’t live too far away from me. When I knock on the door I’m not waiting long before my friend stands before me with no makeup, a shirt that has a substance on it that I don’t recognize with a tired look in her eyes, but a big grin on her face at the sight of me.
“Sienna! Hi!”
“Hi. Sorry I didn’t call first.”
She grabs my arm and pulls me inside, “You never have to call first. My door is open to you always, you know that.”
“Yeah well, it’s dinner time. I don’t want to interfere.”
“You’re not. Scott’s got Sam in the bath and I have a few peaceful moments to myself.”
“You sure I didn’t interrupt you going to take your own bath or shower?” I grimace at her in mock horror and she smacks my arm.
“One day when you’re in this position I plan on plastering my face to the glass windows of your home so I can enjoy the pure entertainment of you slowly going insane. Meanwhile, I’ll just laugh and tell you it’s not so funny now, is it?”
“Well, that’s fair,” I shrug and we laugh.
“So, spill it.”
“What do you mean? Why would you think I have anything to spill?”
“Oh please. I made one trip to the grocery store for milk and got an ear full all about Blake being here - which I totally called by the way…”
