Page 62 of Last First Love
The moment I slide inside her for the first time, we both groan out our satisfaction. The pleasure runs bone deep in me, that feeling of essential rightness of being this close to Lily, the woman of my dreams.
We fit together perfectly, all of my hard places pressing into all of her soft, smooth ones. She's perfect, both in body and at heart. And if this is the only chance I'll get with her, I'm going to do everything I can to make her look back on this night with fondness.
With that in mind, I finally start to move, easing in and out of her tight, wet pussy until she finally relaxes and rises up to meet my motion. She bites her lip at one point and makes a noise in her throat that might have been a growl and I know I haven't lost my touch. I've got this part handled.
The only issue is how long I can hold out for her. I want to stay inside her all night and for as much as possible of the next morning too, but I know I'm not capable of making that happen. I've wanted her too much for too long, and all the lead up tonight has me on a razor's edge.
Instead, I slide my free hand down between us, to stroke her clit just above where we're joined. I look down and see myself sliding in and out of her and it's so intense I almost lose control right then and there. Instead, I shift the angle of my movements and watch the first set of fireworks go off for her.
She's so damn responsive and I can't get enough. Her body shifts and pulses and wriggles as she chases her pleasure against me, and I feel like I could already die a happy man right here and right now.
But I'm not even close to done with her. Instead, I slip out for long enough to reposition us, urging her onto her side and then lifting her leg to get a good view of the sexy curves of her ass. The sight alone is enough to make me speed up, and her back arches at the difference in position, the new places I'm able to hit inside her with every frantic thrust.
She's calling out now, to me and to God, uttering profanity and mewling like a kitten and goddamn if I don't love it. But it's still not enough to make her lose control again, so I reach for her ass this time, and rub my thumb along her tight, puckered hole, applying just enough pressure that there's no mistaking my movements for an accident.
Her eyes fly open and she shrieks, detonating again in an explosion all around me and this time I can't help it. Lightning strikes and I spill inside her, thrusting and pumping erratically until I'm forced to collapse in a messy heap next to her, exhausted both physically and emotionally.
"Wow," she finally says, her voice hoarse from all the screaming, so high five to Daniels Junior. Way to come through for me in my hour of need, buddy.
"You can say that again," I murmur, pulling her right next to me and kissing her along her hairline, where I remember she's a little bit ticklish.
"We should charge admission fees to your dick. I mean, really." She blows out a long, whistling breath. "No wonder K.T. burned all her sex toys."
I snort laugh at that one. "Yeah, Abernathy told me about that. I mean, well done Reed, but I guess that's how it is when you're in love with a woman."
The words hang heavy in the air between us. Well, shit. I can't even pretend like I'm carried away by all the sexy feelings this time because we literally just did it.
But well, fuck it. I don't want Lily to think that I only told her I love her in order to get her pants off. I want her to know how I really feel, who I really am. And I’m the man who loves her.
I kiss her gently at her temple, where her pretty red hair is extra silky, and still a little bit dampened with sweat. "I love you, Lily. I'm so grateful to have you in my life." I clear my throat. "You want to know something about me that nobody else knows?"
Lily scrunches around to look at me, her face giving nothing away. God, but I'd kill to be in her head right now. Her eyes search my face. "Okay," she finally mutters.
I take a deep breath. "I was a big kid. Not like a little bit chunky, but like my parents sent me away from home for a few months to fat camp big kid."
She gasps, her mouth pushing into a sad shape that I immediately move to smooth out with a kiss. "Hey, I don't mean anything bad by it. I'm only saying that I've been at war with my own body. I've been at war with it for as long as I can remember." I nestle against her. "I will do everything I can to keep you from fighting a war of your own, including calling you out each and every time you talk about yourself with anything other than love."
I kiss her gently along her brow, then her eyelids, then her nose. "I'll even come to New York if I have to in order to keep you in line."
Her eyes open again and a little wrinkle pops out along her forehead. "I can't do it," she whispers. Then she buries her face in the curve of my neck. "I can't leave you. Not now."
And the little daydreams of my life with her, me and her and Squiggles in the park, all that almost-real happiness come on me in a rush and I'm dying to stay silent, but I owe it to her. I've got to be my best for her even when it hurts me to do it, and now is the time that she deserves everything I have to offer her.
"Lily, listen to me. This is your big chance to work in high fashion photography. There is no way I am going to be the obstacle between you and your dreams coming true." I swallow the fears that I've been sinking under. "I love you, and I will always love you. And for that reason, I won't come between you and your new job."
She kisses me and I can taste the salt on her mouth, either from sweat or tears. Probably a little of both.
"Are you saying you won't fight for me? For what this could be between us?" Her eyes are wet with emotion, and it guts me. It really does.
I stroke her face gently. "I'm not going to presume to make any of your decisions for you ever again." I give her a rueful smile. "I learned that much. The decision about what to do next is completely up to you, Lily. Just know that whatever you choose, I will love and support you."
I watch as the weight of my words settles on her, and finally she swallows hard and nods. "No more talk about the future tonight," she says, reaching for me again.
I know we're putting off the inevitable, but I don't want to ruin this night with all the things that are wrong with the future when everything about right now is perfect and she feels so damn right under my touch.
Instead of talking more, I fish out some more condoms and bury myself in her in every position I can think of, over and over again until we're both aching and exhausted from having spent ourselves again and again in pursuit of each other's pleasure.
I kiss every inch of her, and whenever she squirms away from my touch, I make sure to spend twice as long worshiping that part of her until she feels the full weight of my reverence for her.
