Page 26 of Big Balls
I wish it had been just a job to me. That working for Big Balls was nothing but a paycheck and a little bit of eye candy with a teeny-tiny side of hero worship. But his cute little daughter grabbed ahold of my heart and still hasn’t let go.
I had all these fun fall trips planned for us. Apple picking, a hay ride, a fall hike with some leaf art afterward. And now all of that collapsed over the course of the most humiliating five minutes of my entire life, when stupid Ethan Alexander told his friends that I was careless and a danger to his child.
I’d never seen any of those people before in my entire life, and that was their entire first impression of me, as if it wasn’t difficult enough for me to meet them all teary-eyed and wracked with misery over what happened with Katy. Then all of his stupid billionaire friends sat there and watched while he basically accused me of not taking care of her. Like it didn’t hurt me when she got hurt.
I suppose it was all for the best that he fired me, because I never wanted to see any of those men again. If I could go to bed and not get up for a few months, that would be almost perfect right about now.
Unfortunately, I am not a filthy rich billionaire with an expensive sports car and a mansion, so I am going to have to figure out the employment issue sooner rather than later. My dad has been great about me living with him after my graduation, but the close quarters are wearing on us both.
We need some space. I’d already started looking at little apartments in Uptown. I’d had enough squirreled away for a deposit on a one-bedroom, but I couldn’t consider anything like that until I had regular work again.
By now, I was willing to guarantee that Ethan Alexander had trashed my reputation with every single human being who had ears and young kids. It was going to be difficult, if not impossible, for me to get another job in childcare, especially one that paid as well as he did.
I pull out my phone and text my besties, asking them each if they had any job leads. But with both of them working in totally different fields, it was extremely unlikely that either of them has a good connection for me to land a new job.
I’m going to have to do this on my own. With any luck, I could get something sooner rather than later and potentially omit the entire chapter of my life where I worked for the fastest hands in football. Eventually the sting of losing out on time with his cutie pie daughter would fade.
I should be relieved that I wouldn’t have to deal with his snarly, moody behavior anymore. Ethan Alexander was a man who loved to say no to everything, when he should have spent his entire time with his daughter enthusiastically saying yes.
A kid like Katy was more than capable of having a fun, adventurous childhood. She could develop her motor skills and coordination through fun, hands-on practice. And being out and about in the world was only going to help her navigate the social circles of elementary school.
I remember my brother telling me about how he’d made a new friend at middle school, and he’d written his phone number on his forehead so Ren could call him later. But he hadn’t written his phone number. He’d written the word “moron” in capital letters.
I’d cleaned it off, and told him that he was so sweaty I couldn’t read the writing. I never told him the truth, but he figured it out eventually anyway. Because the kid was a jerk and couldn’t keep from trying to make my brother miserable for being a little bit different.
I hated middle schoolers already, viewing them with a healthy distrust ever since that kid on the bus taught me how to hold up my middle finger whenever I didn’t like what my dad was saying, resulting in a three-month-long grounding and the most severe talking-to I’d ever received in my life.
But from that day on, I vowed I’d do everything I could to protect my big brother Ren from the middle schoolers of the world, even as he grew into a tall, lanky creature with his own football skills.
And only later did I figure out that no boy on earth wanted to be protected by his little sister. Especially not Ren, who already had a difficult time making his way through the snarls of adolescent society.
I kicked at a bush as I passed by it, dislodging an irritated, noisy squirrel. I had failed my brother at every single opportunity. And that’s precisely why I needed to be the one in Katy’s life.
Because I’d seen what happened when someone was overprotective because of a kid’s autism. I watched my brother build up wall after wall because he felt like we, his own family, were ashamed of who he was. Because he believed that the people who were supposed to love him the best thought he was incapable.
I had to do something. I couldn’t just let this slide. Katy needed me, even if her mean, overbearing asshole of a father couldn’t see it. I ball up my hands into fists and stomp all the way home.
I come home and fling open the door, causing all the men I loved to turn to stare at me. The Sinners game blares on with that idiot Ethan Alexander giving the camera a cool, judgmental look that I was all too familiar with.
My hands tighten into fists, my nails digging into my palms.
“Zoe,” my dad says cautiously. “Are you okay?”
I’m sure I have a crazy look in my eyes, because by the time I’d made it back home, I was beyond angry. I unclench my jaw and give my dad and brothers the most feral smile I can manage.
“I’m fine.” The words crawl out of my throat like a curse.
My dad lets out a heavy sigh, but my asshole brother Shane can’t let it go. “Um, no. You’re not fine. You’ve definitely got murder eyes.” He peers at me closely then narrows his eyes at me. “Is this about the guy who canned you?”
I slam my hand against the door as I close it, savoring the sting of my palm against the hard surface. “I have to go back to them. And I’m not taking no for an answer.” I’m a grown woman, not a little kid anymore.
And I’ll be damned if I let some jerk like Ethan Alexander tell me what to do. Not when I’m the one who actually knows what his daughter needs.
My father shakes his head at me. “You said it yourself. You can’t work for him anymore. He’s impossible.”
I stand up and pace across my tiny kitchen in the house I’ve shared with my familyfor so many years. “He’s Katy’s father. But I’m the one who is going to be there for her. To let her have the life she wants, instead of the one that he feels is safest.”
My eyes flick to Ren, whose expression doesn’t change. I don’t know if he understands how much guilt I have about all the mistakes I made while we were growing up together.
