Page 25 of Cassie
He kneeled beside her, resting on his heels.So beautiful. Eyes locked on her face, he removed his own jacket and pulled the long-sleeved shirt he’d worn tonight over his head in a single movement. Reaching down, he tugged off his boots, then worked on hers, tossing them off the end of the bed. Through it all, she kept her gaze on his face, her breathing fast but steady, aroused…not afraid.God, so brave. He slipped his hands up the outside of her thighs, meeting at the waistband of her jeans as he deftly unfastened button and zipper. Discarding them, his eyes went to the juncture of her thighs, inhaling the scented promise of passion teasing him.
Blue satin panties covered her, and already he could imagine how that scrap would slip and slide underneath with his fingertips. He reached out and dragged a thumb across the skin of her leg, up against the edge of the material, and then dipped under to feel the silky skin covering the hollow of her hip. Wrapping his hand around one side of her panties, he pulled and tugged, surprised when she didn’t lift to make it easier. When he brought his gaze to her face, it took a moment for him to recognize and react to what was happening, but when he did, he moved fast to try and stave off the attack. Hoss braced himself over her, trying to keep from trapping her as he stretched out a hand to her too-pale face and spoke softly. “Cassie, look at me, baby. Look at me. I’m right here with you.”
Within the scant moments he had looked away, she had begun to lock up, breath coming faster, and the pulse in her throat was throbbing underneath her skin.Fuck, what can I do? She’s probably feeling vulnerable, exposed. Palm cupping her jaw, he called, “Give me your eyes, baby.” He could see the moment the connection between them was made, when she saw him again, not whatever was in her head, and he leaned down to touch his forehead to hers. “There you are. There’s my good girl. My gorgeous, good girl.”
“Hoss.” Cassie whispered his name and shifted slightly, pulling back. He frowned, reading avoidance into the movement. He realized he wasn’t wrong when she began, “You should…” Taking a deep breath, she whispered, voice soft as a sigh, “That’s to say, Isaiah…Mr. Rogers.” Every devolving word took her further from him and Hoss could nearly feel the wrench as that distance increased when her gaze dropped from his eyes to his chin, and stuck there, the first time in forever that she’d avoided his eyes.Dammit, no.
“Hoss,” he reminded her and felt her flinch at the burning anger in his voice.Shit, I didn’t mean to scare her worse. “I’m Hoss, honey. And I’m right here, with you. Don’t take yourself away from me. Let me have you, honey. I’m staying with you. It’s just me, baby. Just Hoss.” He tilted his head and strained, searching her face to find the woman who had dinner with him, kissed him in her kitchen, who stayed in his arms all the way up the stairs, but Cassie even looked different when she was afraid. “Nothin’ to be afraid of here, honey. I’d never do anything you didn’t want. Never hurt you. Hand to my heart, I promise. I’m just…Hoss, honey. I’m just Hoss. That’s who I am, and I’m here with you, my gorgeous, brave girl.”
Her lips parted, and she breathed out his name, that single syllable wavering with her effort. “Hoss.”
Mesmerized, he watched as her hand lifted and fluttered aimlessly at the end of a quaking arm.She’s looking for something, he thought, and pressed his cheek into her palm. He held her gaze, letting her use that touch to anchor herself if that’s what she needed.Give you anything.
“Hoss,” she agreed again, gaze locked with his as her thumb glided across his lips. Not an attempt to silence him, but a resumption of the exploration.
“Cassie. Honey, you’re safe with me. Always. Come back to me.” Parting his lips, he sucked the tip of her thumb into his mouth and bit gently, watching her pink tongue slide across her bottom lip.
Encouraged, he dipped his chin the barest amount, touching his mouth to hers. When he shifted position, her eyes closed, and he could again feel her retreating.No, dammit. “I’m sorry,” she whispered, lips moving under his. “You should leave. This isn’t something…no one wants this. No one wants to see. Not this. You should…just go.” She pulled in a ragged breath. “I can’t. You should go. Trust me.”
“Cassie, nothing to be sorry for, baby.” Since he had lost her eyes, Hoss leaned in further, rubbing his cheek against hers, shifting his legs and hips so they were more side by side. “Give me five minutes, and if you really want me to, I’ll leave. Five minutes, but right now I’m here. You told me to stay, and I want to. So much. But if you need me to go, I will.” Moving up in the bed, he nabbed a pillow and shoved it underneath his head, then reached out, slid an arm around her stiff shoulders and slowly urged her to roll into him. “Five minutes, babe. Five minutes and I’ll go. But only if you still want me to, because I swear, Cassie, I’d rather stay.” He needed her to understand he wouldn’t be so easily dissuaded. “Gonna stay where I am. Right here. I’m right here with you.” There was a small blanket folded to one side, and he grabbed that to drape over them both, then pulled it across her legs more fully.
Voice trembling, she said, “No, please. I want…” She took a hard, hitching breath, then a softer tone, her voice thick with emotion as she struggled to say the word he most wanted to hear. “Stay.”
“All right, honey. I’m here.” One hand around her back, he held her firmly, keeping her pulled close to his side as she shuddered and shook, her body still in the grip of overwhelming fear. Every movement tore his heart open a little wider.This woman is stronger than she knows. Hoss reached up with his other hand, threaded his fingers through her hair, and gently removed the tie that was failing to hold it in more than a half-assed ponytail. Once he had access to the full length, he stroked her hair, slow and long, fingers working in up by her scalp, massaging for a moment, then pulling through, untangling as he went.
He brushed through the length repeatedly, keeping her pressed against him with a firm grip on her hip. Again and again, he stroked and petted until she sagged against him, exhaustion finally winning the battle, dragging her down into sleep. When she finally went under, her whole body relaxed in a way that told him exactly how tightly wound she was most of the time.I can’t imagine carrying that every day, he thought, his hand moving automatically through her now tangle-free, silken hair.Bravest fucking woman I ever met.
