Page 135 of Outlaw Heartstrings
“Have you had a conversation with Easton yet?” Tammy asks, her forehead creased with concern as she takes the popcorn bowl from Jules and digs in.
“I don’t think there’s a point,” I mutter. “There’s nothing left to say.”
“What do you mean it’s no point?” Laney asks.
I swallow thickly. “What we had was amazing. It was beautiful. But the glue that was holding us together fell apart. It’s over now.” If Easton isn’t Jagger’s father, what we had is…nothingnow.
“That doesn’t have to be true unless you let it be true,” Tammy argues.
“We can’t be together, Tam. How would that even work?” I say, feeling exhausted. Tired of trying. I lower my voice to ensure that Jagger can’t hear. “I can’t ask Easton to stick around and raise a child that’s not his. That wouldn’t be fair to him.”
“Easton loves you. He loves Jagger,” my mother says. “What’s unfair is not giving him the chance to be a part of this family just because he isn’t related to Jagger by DNA.”
“Exactly. So what if your little family is a tiny bit unconventional? Who cares? As long as you’re building a home filled with love,” Jules says softly.
Mom nods in agreement. “It’s what you and I have been doing for years.”
“We…we can’t.” I give my head a little shake. “I can’t do that with Easton. As tempting as it sounds, that’s not how it’s done.”
“That’s not howwhatis done?” Laney asks, frowning at me.
“Family,” I say. “There are rules for building a family. Easton, Jagger and me? We don’t fit any of those rules.”
“Who cares about the rules?” Jules says defiantly. “Who says you have to do things the way everyone else does them? Especially if it’s not aligned with who you are inside?” She says the words so passionately. I know she’s thinking about her own unusual family situation.
Tammy vigorously shakes her head. “Most people do most of the things they do the way they do them, because that’s the way the people around them do it. If you asked them for one logical reason for the choices they make on a daily basis, they wouldn’t be able to give it to you.”
“Wow. That was really deep.” Laney sniffles, wiping the back of her hand across her nose.
“I’ve been reading my self-help books.” Tammy grins proudly.
Jules bobs her head approvingly and smiles. “Nice. Proud of you, girl.”
“Thanks to my crusty ex-husband, I’m in a steady and committed relationship with the self-help aisle at the local bookstore.” We all chuckle. Tammy exhales harshly,growing serious again. “Here’s the thing—every soul requires a different prescription. So how about you just listen to the little girl who’s hiding beneath the years and years of social expectations? What does that little girl want?”
“She wants Easton…” I admit, my voice hoarse and cracked.
Mom bumps her shoulder into mine. “Then you’re going to have to figure out how to make things work with your man.”
50
EASTON
“Seriously, though—are youevergonna get up and wash your ass?”
Lethargically, I turn my head and find Rocco pinching his nose and glaring at me from the other end of the couch.
Mom leans across from her recliner and whacks him with a throw cushion. “Be nice to your brother. He’s sad.”
“He stinks,” Oliver says flatly, opening all the windows in the living room before dropping on the carpet with the TV remote. “If we don’t do something about it soon, we’re going to have to call pest control.” He shoots me an unpleasant scowl as he scoots across the carpet, trying to get further away from me.
My bicep is as heavy as a log when I lift it and take a sniff of my underarm. My eyes water. Maybe I’m getting emotional again. Or maybe I reallydostink. At this point, I don’t know.
Mom grabs the remote from Oliver and turns off the television before shooing my brothers away with a wave of her hand. “You know what? Make yourselves useful. Go gethim some spaghetti and meatballs. Don’t forget the extra parmesan.”
“We can just order take out,” Rocco whines, trying to sneak the remote from where it’s tucked in the cushions next to our mother.
He’s a brave man.
