Page 57 of Outlaw Heartstrings
My chest starts pounding when I read the words.Boo-boom. Boo-boom. Boo-boom.
I take a sip of my freshly-brewed coffee, which doesn’t help my thrumming heart.
Jules: I think he’s getting ‘curious’ about you. He wants to know if you’re dating.
Boom—boo-boom-boom-boommm.
Yup. Caffeine might not be such a great idea right about now.
Jules: Don’t worry. My lips are sealed. But I think this hockey jock might be interested in more than a co-parenting arrangement…
When I read those words, I set my mug down on the break table and shake out my tingling hands. Jules is being ridiculous. As usual. Easton isn’t interested in me. That would be…ridiculous. Right?
But what about that kiss…?the horny little devil on my shoulder prods.A kiss like thathadto mean something.
No. That kiss meant nothing. It was a lapse in judgment. A wrinkle in time. A tiny, little glitch in the matrix. It meant nothing and it’s never gonna mean anything and it’s never gonna happen again.
Easton and I are trying to work out an arrangement that suits Jagger. That’s about it. I can’t let my crazy bestie start putting ideas in my head.
My fingertips fly across my phone and I text her back.
Me: Thanks for the heads up. But I think you might be reading too much into the situation.
I put my phone back into my uniform pocket and get back to work. This shift is far from over.
Too bad I can’t focus. Thoughts of Easton haunt the back of my mind the whole night.
21
ALBA
Today’s a big day. One I’ve been nervous about all week.
But nervous or not, it’s overdue. Today is the day that Jagger gets to meet all of Easton’s family, as we gather for family dinner.
Along with Jagger, my mom and me, we’re expecting Easton, his mother and his three brothers. Also, I totally didn’t know that Lincoln has a son who’s a little younger than Jagger. This makes me so happy.
Growing up as an only child has been isolating for Jagger so far, and I kind of figured that cousins were out of the cards for him at this point. But not only has Jagger’s family quadrupled overnight, he now has a friend for life in his cousin, Cameron.
Easton told me that his mom and brothers took the news of Jagger’s existence really well. Naturally, his mom was shocked, but also thrilled to add to their family. His brothers are excited for another boy to join the Raines gang.
Even still, I’m anxious about what they’ll think of Jagger.Of what they’ll think of my decision to keep him a secret all these years.
I feel embarrassed that I didn’t give Easton the benefit of the doubt. I feel guilty that I didn’t allow him the opportunity to decide whether he wanted to be in Jagger’s life. I feel ashamed that I deprived an amazing father of the first eight years of his son’s life.
And I am…so…very…sorry.
Am I a perfect person? No. Not at all. Did I make mistakes in this situation? I most definitely did. Do I deserve Easton’s grace after what I’ve done? Probably not.
But I’d really, really like the opportunity to make things right. I can only hope that Easton will allow me to do that. I think that tonight is the first step in that direction.
When the doorbell rings, I rush down the hallway to answer it. To be honest, I was a little surprised that my mom wanted to host tonight’s get together at her place. Easton insisted on buying pizza for everyone and keeping tonight casual. I have a hunch that he was just trying to keep things easy for my mother, for which I’m thankful.
I open the door and a grinning grade schooler scampers inside. He’s followed by Monica Raines and her mammoth sons who trail behind her like towering bodyguards.
One. Two. Three. Four.
Wow—the Raines family is breathtaking.
