Page 66 of Rush
‘Oh, Savannah…’ he sighed. ‘You know I can’t say no to a race.’
‘I know,’ she grinned.
‘What if I fall off?’
‘You won’t. Remember what I taught you?’
‘It’s ingrained in my memory forever.’
‘You’ll be fine. I’m there to catch you.’
He watched her gallop on ahead, knowing he would never catch her up. He laughed at the reality of the situation; Savannah Hart may never be the one to love him, but he would always be there to pick up the pieces when her life got turned upside down.
Savi sat round the campfire with her family, listening to Marco and Wes sing Italian nursery rhymes. She should be enjoying her evening, spending time with her family. But instead, she felt nothing except dread for the phone call she was going to have to return when she got back to her room. Jesse had been blowing her phone up for an hour on his work number, which she had stupidly forgotten to block.
‘I think I’m gonna get an early night.’ She stood up from her chair. ‘Feeling tired from all the riding and I’ve got a headache coming on. Thanks for dinner, Ma. Are we riding again tomorrow, Mars?’
‘You’ve got it.’ He gave her a smile, but it was one full of sadness. He had seen her check her phone multiple times, which meant he knew what she was going to do.
Taking a deep breath, Savi sat down on the edge of her bed. This room was full of her childhood self: her teddy bear and photos of her and her friends, the floral bedding she’d picked out when she was sixteen and obsessedwith lavender. She should feel safe from Jesse’s influence in here, but she was terrified to make this call.
‘Savi?’ His face filled the screen at the same time his voice echoed around the room, and she regretted selecting the video option. Jesse scowled at her, looking angry– more than just a little disgruntled. ‘Why didn’t you pick up?’
‘I was with my family. Why did you call so many times?’
‘I wanted to talk things through. See if we could salvage this.’
‘There is nothing to talk through, Jesse. You fucked up, you ruined us. I just want to know all the reasons you didn’t want to take our relationship to the next level. Why you pursued other women, when I was right here, willing to give you everything you said you wanted.’
‘Sav.’ He rolled his eyes. ‘We’ve been through this countless times. Don’t you listen?’
‘We should have been buying a house, getting married. All the big life things. But we got stuck at square one, Jesse. You said you wanted those things.’
‘We had the cabin! I don’t know what more you wanted from me. I was too busy to give you everything else, Savi!’ he cried out.
‘Yourcabin. My lingerie might be in the drawer, but no part of that cabin was ever mine. You told me you wanted to build a life with me, Jess, but you refused to actually make any moves that would allow us to have the happily ever after we used to talk about.’
‘Life isn’t a fucking fairytale, Savi. I don’t know what else to tell you.’
‘Actually, I think it can be. If you let it be, life canbe pretty magical sometimes. And I have had plenty of moments where I’ve thought magic might be playing a part, some of those were shared with you back when we first met, but those moments have mostly happened alone, or with my team. Where were you for that? You haven’t come to a single race.’
‘You know I couldn’t come to any races. I had no reason to be there, so everyone would know about us. A quick internet search tells you we grew up twenty-five minutes apart, it wouldn’t take long to connect the dots.’
‘You could’ve asked to come to Spa, Monza or Sao Paolo with any number of other celebrities who come to watch the race and soak up the atmosphere. Even Weston is pushing past his reservations and coming to watch me compete. He’s opening himself up to all these questions from the media about his condition by being there, but he’s doing it because he loves me. He wants to support me. He’s putting me first.’
‘Your brother finally got the balls to leave Mustang Ridge?’ Jesse laughed.
Savi felt the colour drain from her face. ‘Excuse me?’
‘That might have been too far.’ He had the decency to look guilty, but then the emotion disappeared from his features, and he reverted to being cold and uncaring. ‘But what I’m getting at is, life doesn’t always work out the way you want it to. Shit goes wrong, you get thrown curveballs. My life has become utter chaos since Sapphire told me she was pregnant.’
Savi laughed. ‘No shit. And who’s fault is that, Jess?’ She waited for him to say more, but the words never came. ‘I’vetried. I’ve really tried, and I’ve pushed for more and you haven’t been receptive to a single attempt. I loved you; I wanted you. Forever and always. But I guess I should’ve known the day you signed your record deal that things were going to change.’
‘What are you saying?’ He swallowed roughly, his hands on his hips.
‘I’m cutting all ties, Jesse. For good,’ she said, her eyes welling up with years’ worth of tears for her past, present and future self. For the little girl who had just wanted what her parents had, who believed in the magic of fairytales and true love. ‘Not once have you taken accountability for the other women, or for your baby. I don’t recognise you anymore. Hell, I barely recognise myself.’
‘Maybe we really are better off staying out of each other’s lives, then,’ he sighed, acting like this was all his idea, trying to twist the narrative until it seemed like he was doing her a favour by not fighting for her.
