Page 72 of Tempting Jupiter
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Fee’s stomach twisted in her gut and the pillow in her hands fell to the floor as Seneca gripped her arms. He thought she’d taken Jupiter from him. He’d choked on the words as he barked them at her—ache in every syllable. “Sen, I…”
“You what?” He shook her hard then lifted her up until only her toes touched the floor. “You didn’t know he was my mate? Didn’t know he chose you?” His words softened and came slower, but his chest still heaved with strained breaths. “Don’t even try to pretend you didn’t know exactly what you were doing every step of the way.”
She hung in the tight grip of his hands, their faces close. The heat of him like a flame. Despite the accusation, she knew his words were more pain than anger. She recognized it because she felt it too. They both feared losing the man they loved. The man they both loved. The only difference was that she’d already lost him, with only herself to blame. “Oh, Sen.” She reached for him, but his grip didn’t budge. She could only just touch his waist. She squeezed against the muscle. “I didn’t know at first that your love for each other was more than friendship. I didn’t figure things out until we were on that burned out resistance ship. Even when I’d figured out you were a pair, I didn’t understand exactly how. Even before I ran out of options that wouldn’t push you both away, I knew you both deserved better than a woman with a calling that would always come first.”
Seneca set her on her feet and loosened his grip. Eyes dark and cold.
Feeona slipped her hands up to frame his face. With her eyes she pled for him to see the naked honesty she bared. It was like ripping off her own skin, but it was better than seeing him suffering. “Don’t you see? I never wanted to take him away from you.” Her eyes filled with tears and her throat tightened. A ball of grief lodged in her chest, weighing her down. The weight of a loss that swelled larger every day. She’d already lost Jupiter. Seneca had never been hers, but she was coming to respect him, to count on him, to care for him in a way that added to her grief for what they could never have. “When we get Jupiter back, you’ll be free of me. He’ll need you more than ever, and I’ll be out of the way. He already loves you. He just needs to figure out what it can mean. I thought I could help bring you together. I thought—”
“You thought fucking a woman together would make him see me?” He scoffed. “You aren’t that naive.”
She fought not to look away from his eyes. She couldn’t let him believe she stood between him and Jupiter. “Maybe I am naive, but I thought if I encouraged you to touch him, he’d see you wanted him, and you’d see he isn’t blind to you. Not at all. I don’t think he even allows himself to think of you that way. He’s afraid of reminding you of the past when you had no choice. Afraid of hurting you, maybe even losing you.”
Seneca’s eyes melted back to a deep lavender as he rubbed at the place where he’d been gripping her arms, as if he could rub away the hurt. “He told you this?”
She slipped her hands down to his chest and let her palm rest over his pounding heart. “He didn’t have to tell me. I heard it in his voice when he told me about your past. I saw the heat in his eyes when you touched him when we were in bed.” She let the memories lift the corners of her lips. “He loves it when you touch him, and not in a brotherly way.”
Seneca ended up being the first to look away, but not before she saw a flicker of hope lighten those tortured eyes.
“We should get going,” he said.
She patted his chest, then wiped away her tears. “Yeah, we should.”
His hands still held her arms loosely. “I’ve probably bruised you again.”
She cupped his cheek and managed a friendlier smile for him. “There’s a salve for that. Remember?”
He nodded then bent to pick up the pillow she’d dropped. “Mmm hmm. I’ll help you with that later.”
She thought she should protest—she didn’t need his help—but all she offered was a concession. “Later.”
***
Feeona watched the data flicker over the screen as the skipdrive leveled off and their flight became stable. “What do you see?”
“Everything seems to be within the normal range.” Seneca tilted his head as if he could read the data better at an angle. Not long after they’d made peace, he’d demanded she teach him about piloting the ship. She’d argued that with Alfred online there wasn’t any need. Sen had insisted. His ears flicked. “Did I miss something?”
“No.” Feeona reached over and patted his hand. “You got it right. Everything is good.”
He nodded, looking satisfied. His silver hair picked up the lights from the control panel, crowning him in shades of ruby and emerald.
She pulled free of her safety restraints and stretched. “Alfred, load the file on theAbundance’s security system to this terminal, I want to work on it for a while.”
“Yes, Captain. Where would you like the data you requested for Mr. Seneca?”
Seneca raised an eyebrow.
Feeona shrugged. “I had him grab as much data off the long-range feeds as he could while we were transitioning from orbit to skipspace. I figured you’d want to scan for news on your pack brothers.”
His eyes widened for a fraction of a second. “Thank you, Fee. Alfred, can you do a preliminary scan of the data?”
“Yes. It would be my pleasure. I have all of the relevant parameters on file.”
“Then do it and have it ready for me when we wake. Feeona and I are going to get some rest now. It’s been a long day.”
“New Hope does have a twenty-eight hour day,” Alfred added.
