Page 155 of A Bond so Fierce and Fragile
As if she could ever hurt him by touching him. And this… this grip meant that she was angry.
Good. It was good to be angry in war. Better than being afraid. Better than worrying.
“Where are we going?” Lessia hissed when Merrick began dragging her across the deck.
“You and I need to talk.” Merrick’s eyes remained on the steep cliff, the steps leading up to it, and he continued pulling on her hand to make her move faster as he fought against the souls pressing all around him, even under his skin, making his pulse thrum wildly—and not in a fun way.
“Why can’t we just talk here?”
Merrick threw a look over his shoulder and found Lessia frowning at him while his friends, some of Loche’s soldiers, and the Faelings gaped as they watched them get off the ship.
“Because,” Merrick forced out, trying to keep his tone level while his whispers whipped the air around them. “If I stay, I might kill someone, and I don’t think that’d be great for morale, do you?”
Lessia pursed her lips, but she must have realized he meant it because she remained quiet as Merrick lifted her onto the ship behind them and dragged her across that one as well while the soldiers parted, giving them a wide berth, until they reached the gangway leading them to the island.
The isle was rocky and barren and suited Merrick’s fury perfectly.
They stayed quiet as they climbed the steps leading up to the plateau, and it wasn’t until Merrick dragged her to the end of it and sat down with his legs dangling off, making sure Lessia followed, that he began speaking again.
“I know what you’re going to say.” Merrick didn’t look her way even when he felt her eyes move across his face.
He didn’t trust himself not to take her and run if he did.
“But I am doing the fucking best I can,” Merrick continued, hating how angry he sounded and hoping Lessia knew his anger wasn’t directed at her, despite the way it might come across. “I have said it before. I don’t giveone shitabout this damned world. Or about the people down there. Fuck, I don’t give a shit about any of it. The only thing I care about is sitting right next to me.”
Lessia’s hand, which he’d let go of as they sat down, found its way into his again as he shuddered.
“I’m not living without you!” Merrick glared so hard at the horizon that it blurred. “I don’t care that the others can do it, that they might be stronger than I ever will be. That they might even find some light once in a while. My purpose in this life was to find you, and I believe also to keep you alive, so that’s the one damned thing I am going to do. This ismyfucking choice.”
“Okay.”
“So I am going to fucking—” Merrick’s words drifted off with the wind when he realized she’d spoken.
Okay?
“What did you say?” He had to face her now; he couldn’t not do it, couldn’t not allow himself to savor every moment, every second with her.
“I said okay,” Lessia responded, her eyes falling into his, no defiance, no fight, no fake smile touching them.
“Why?” Merrick stared at her as she shuffled closer on the cliff, sliding one of her legs between his own until she half sat in his lap.
Pressing her nose into his cheek, Lessia whispered, “Because I don’t want to live without you either.”
Well… Fuck.
Merrick’s heart pounded so hard in his chest that he was sure Lessia could hear it.
He’d prepared a whole speech when he stomped up those stairs, as he’d been certain she’d fucking fight for her life for him to change his mind.
“So you’ll stay by me?”
Lessia wove a hand into his hair, dragging her nails down his scalp. “I’ll try.”
“Lessia,” he warned quietly.
“I am also doing the best I can.” Her whisper was sharper now. “I will try. I will fight. I do promise you that. But I cannot see the future, Merrick. I do not know what will happen once we’re in the midst of it all. You’ll have to take it or leave it.”
He ground his teeth, everything in him wanting to demand more of her—order her to promise him everything he wished.
