Page 2 of Never Really Mine
I tilt my head to glance up at him, admiring his chocolate brown eyes and mussed hair. “Just thinking about your AXE body spray phase.”
He groans, squeezing me tighter. “That wasn’t nearly as bad as your Warm Vanilla Sugar phase from Bath and Body Works.”
I gasp, pulling away from him. “Hey, I smelled like a cookie, which is much better than… whatever you smelled like.”
“Alright,” he chuckles. “You’ve got me there. You did smell like a cookie.” He pulls me back into his side and I relax into his touch. A lot of the time, people assume we’re dating, because of the way he holds me, or hugs me sometimes, but we’re both quick to correct them. Beau’s just a physical touch kind of guy, and he’s a great hugger, so it’s a win-win, in my opinion.
“I feel like things are going to change when we go to school,” I murmur. I gaze off into the distance as I speak, too afraid to meet his eye. I know he’s going to tell me that it won’t, but I can’t help but feel like he’s just saying that to appease me.
“They will,” he says. I whip my head off his shoulder to look at him. He’s grinning maniacally.
“Beau,” I squeal. “You’re supposed to tell me that things aren’t going to change!” I smack his chest lightly.
“They are, though!” He tries to defend himself. “Just because things in our lives are changing, doesn’t mean thatwehave to change.”
I nod, hearing what he’s saying. “I guess. I’m just so scared I’m going to lose you. You’re the best thing in my life, Beau.” I squeeze him tightly.
“Marley, you could never lose me.” He grips my chin, tilting my face upwards. “Eventually, we’re going to get married tosomeone, have kids, grow old, but I willalwaysbe there for you. You’re my best friend.”
I don’t know why, but his words feel like a knife straight through my heart. Leaving me aching and bleeding for everyone to see. I nod, words failing me.
His eyes stray from mine down to my lips. They dart back up when he realizes what he’s done, but it’s too late. I saw, and I know what he’s thinking. He pulls away from me, shifting slightly. I straighten so I’m no longer tucked under his arm, trying to shake off the embarrassment that is currently forcing its way through my body.
When I’m confident I have my breathing under control, I turn back to Beau. “You’re my best friend too, Beau. You’re right, we’ll always hav-”
I’m cut off by lips crashing onto mine.Beau’slips.
Holy shit, is Beau kissing me?
I pull away, gasping for air, trying to process this new feeling. “Beau, what-”
He stops me, tucking a hair behind my ear. His eyes are wild, breathing ragged. “I just couldn’t go another moment without knowing what your lips feel like.”
My eyes flick down to his lips, where his tongue is darting out to wet them. He notices, and his hand slides down my jaw to cup my cheek. “What do they feel like?” I ask.
“Otherworldly.”
I nod, my heart fluttering in response to the unexpected kiss, and the way he described it. “And that’s good?” I ask.
“So flippin good.” He presses a softer kiss to my lips, lingering there for a long moment. I’ve been kissed before by one other guy, but he had braces. When I tried to make out with him, my tongue got caught on one of the wires. Talk about embarrassing.
Beau’s tongue slides between my lips, tasting me, teasing me. I wrap my arms around his neck, holding him to me. He skilfully moves our tongues together, the hand not on my cheek sliding around my neck. I begin to lose myself in the kiss, the alarm bells screaming at me that this isBeau, and we shouldn’t be doing this, starting to quiet in my head.
Someone wolf-whistles from the river, and we spring apart like someone shocked us with a live wire. I hold my breath for a moment, scooting away from him. I release it, trying to calm my pounding heart. “So…” I start to say. Does this change literally everything I thought I knew?
Beau stops me. “I… I don’t know how to say this.”
Was my heart pounding before? Because now it’s not even beating. Blood drains from my face, because I know what’s coming. I’m not girlfriend material—at least not for Beau. I’m just the best friend.
I resign myself to this fact, taking a deep breath before I interrupt him. Saying what I know he’s going to say. “We can’t do that again. Not if we want to keep our friendship.”
Beau nods, blowing out a breath, running his hands through his hair. “Yeah.” His jaw tightens, and I see a flash of something in his eyes, some new emotion I have never seen in him before. It worries me, not knowing what that emotion is, or what kind of ripple effect this will have on our friendship.
“Good.” He doesn’t say anything, but he doesn’t need to. I just single-handedly saved myself from the inevitable heartbreak of hearing him say the words that I dreaded hearing from him. I mean, sure, there’s been tension leading up to this moment, but that’s all it was. We are teenagers, after all. And you know what they say about hormones.
Beau pulls me in close again, and I let myself pretend for just a moment that things could be different, that I could be his, andhe could be mine. But I know it’s just a silly dream. If I want to keep him, I’ll never get to have him in the way I really want.
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