Page 9 of Never Really Mine
I turn, rushing down the hall to the bridal suite, trying to shake off the rollercoaster of emotions from the last five minutes. I can’t even begin to process it, and I need to get it together. This weekend is not about me and my bullshit. It’s about Josie and Andrew.
I suck in another breath, risking one last look at Beau, standing in the same spot at the opposite end of the hall. His fingers are running through his hair, his eyes glassy, face flushed. He steps forward when he sees me looking, but I shake my head, opening the door to the suite with the key Josie gave me.
I shut the door behind me quickly as if running from a ghost. All eyes are on me as I try to control my emotions. Josie’s brow furrows, her eyes widening after I stand still for a long moment. Dammit, she can see right through the façade I’m trying to put on. Everyone is dressed in matching pajama sets, glasses of wine in their hands. Nikki Cunningham, Andrew and Beau’s mom, slowly rises from her spot on the plush couch.
My mother eyes me from her corner of the room, where she’s laying cucumbers over Lennie’s eyes. Lennie’s thick brown hair is swept back with a bow headband, and she has a goopy face mask on.
“Gotta pee!” I shriek, darting right into the bathroom and slamming the door. With the door closed, I glance at myself in the mirror. My eyes are wild, cheeks flushed red, hair falling out of my ponytail as if I just had a weekend long fuck fest. I spot a set of satin pajamas hanging on the hanger behind the door, my name written on the tag. The color matches my dress for tomorrow, a marigold yellow that Josie says perfectly accentuates my skin tone. Thankfully, my makeup remover is still in here from earlier when we got ready. I wash my face, taking my time, giving myself a long minute to calm down.
I’ve just changed into my pajama set when there's a soft knock on the bathroom door. “Marley? Can I come in?”
I shouldn’t be surprised that Nikki is the one to come to my aid, and even though I love her with my whole heart, she is the last person I want to talk to right now. She’s the one who raised the man of my dreams and has been a second mom to me since I was a kid, the person I would run to when I needed someone to talk to about things I was too embarrassed to discuss with my own mother.
Flinging open the door, I’m met with her kind eyes. “Sorry, I just figured I would change while I was in there,” I say, gesturing behind me. My dress is in a rumpled pile on the counter, waiting for me to put it on the hanger.
Nikki nods, her blue eyes taking in my appearance. “Are you okay, sweetie?”
“I’m just fine, I drank too much, so I’m feeling a little flustered!” Even I can hear the lie in my voice.
Thankfully, she drops it. “Josie wants to go over her plans for tomorrow, if you’re okay with that?”
“Oh, yes! Let me hang my dress, and I’ll be right out.”
Nikki reaches out, squeezing my hand softly, then turns to head into the room. I take a deep breath and turn to grab my dress and hang it. I take a final glance into the mirror and decide I’m as good as I’m going to get.
The small group of women are scattered around the room. Nikki and Josie sit on the couch with Josie’s older sister, Jess, in the middle. She’s around eight months pregnant, and looks utterly miserable. She’s spent most of the day trying to hide her discomfort, but I’ve seen it.
Josie and Jess have grown much closer in the last year once Jess moved back to Minnesota. She and her husband were in Missouri for a long time while he was stationed at a military base. She told me once she had no ill will toward her, but theyjust weren't close. I’m happy that has changed. I always wanted a sister.
It makes me wish that someday Jason will find someone so Lennie doesn’t grow up without siblings. At the very least, maybe Josie and Andrew will pop out kids sooner or later so she has cousins to play with.
I’m not especially close with my older brothers. Kenny works as a PA in the ER a few towns over, and Prescott lives his own life. I don’t see either of them often, and sometimes I wish we were closer, but that’s just the way it is for us.
Megan, Isaac’s wife and now Josie’s close friend, sits on one of the queen-sized beds. She pats the empty spot next to her, and I nearly launch myself at her. I’ve always been close with Megan, but having Josie has helped us grow our relationship even further. She’s a few years younger than me, the same age as Andrew and Isaac, but we all grew up together.
Megan pulls me into her side, and Josie gives me a little side glance. Her eyes say the words she can’t.You okay?
Even though I’m dying to talk to her about this on the inside, I will not take her attention away from her wedding weekend. I refuse to. I nod at her, hoping she buys the lie.
Josie’s mom, Lori, stands from the other bed, heading to the small desk covered in empty paper cups and bottles of wine. She fills a cup and hands it to me. Her smile is kind. I swear, moms have a sixth sense about things because she reaches down, clasps my forearm, and gives it a gentle squeeze.
I smile softly up at her, and turn my focus to my friend. Josie clasps her hands in front of her as she sits cross-legged on the couch. Her red hair is neatly pulled back into a loose pony, her face glowing from the moisturizing products used on her skin.
“The next twenty-four hours are going to be pretty crazy, so I wanted to touch base and see how everyone is doing,” she says.Her blue eyes scan the room, stopping as she glances at each of us to assess.
Jess lifts her hand off her pregnant belly, wincing as she tries to scoot herself to a better position. “I have a question.”
“What’s up?” Josie asks.
“What if I have to pee in the middle of the ceremony?” she asks. Her brows are furrowed, and her face so serious, that I can’t help but snicker slightly.
Josie’s stunned silent for a moment at the unexpected question. “Uhh,” she starts.
“I know where da bathroom is, Miss Jess,” Lennie says, rising from her relaxed position in a loveseat.
“Thank you so much, Lennie,” Jess coos, a smile quirking on her full lips. “I’ll let you know if I need help getting there. How does that sound sweetie?”
“Okay,” Lennie replies. She’s grown so much in her speech in the last year that I can hardly believe she’s the same little girl who called me Auntie Mawey for the longest time.
