Page 33 of Resting Grump Face
Goddamn it, Robyn.“First of all, I did not have relations with that man. Secondly, it’s nothing like that. He is hiring me as a PR consultant to fix his image and I want to know what kind of person he is so that I can properly do my job.”
“So staking out the person whose image you’re supposed to fix is normal procedure for a PR consultant?” Robyn asks and raises both her eyebrows.
Fine, maybe this is a bit unusual, but it is a good idea.All those scandals must come from somewhere, so finding out who I am really dealing with just makes sense. The biggest problem will be how to stop him from being such a soulless prick to prevent more bad press in the future.
“Yes, very common, actually,” I answer deadpan.
Robyn blows on her hot cup of coffee and nods, letting me know she knows I’m full of shit.
“We’re in,” Earnest thankfully interrupts.
“A car?” Guy asks, a little confused.
Earnest shakes his head. “Ryker Grayson’s computer.”
“Ryker Grayson?” Paige and Guy ask simultaneously and sit up straight. Looks like they are much better informed about the current gossip of D-list celebrities than I am. “What are we doing with Ryker Grayson’s computer?”
“That’s my new boss,” I explain. “He wants me to come and work for him, so last night Earnest and I sent him a contract that defines the parameters of my employment. Except that PDF file included a computer virus thingy. Right, Earn?”
Earnest grumbles. “Sure, let’s call it that.”
Outside, the sun slowly rises, lifting the fog off us and revealing a strangely phallic looking skyscraper with two domes at the ground floor. It's so pointy and erect, one might think it's compensating for something on someone’s behalf. The locals call it The Cloud Tickler and given the thrusting spire that penetrates the fog above, I can see why. Once again, I wonder what Mr. Handsome With His Big Building is doing at the moment, until I notice everyone is still looking at me.
“Right, so here’s the deal: As long as I work for Mr. Graysonofabitch?—”
“Language!” Paige interjects.
“As long as I work forthatman, I get paid $5000 per week. If he signs the contract we sent him, that is. That money, minus my living expenses, will pay for your debt, Robyn, and legal fees. All the additional money I hopefully accumulate, until I inevitably get fired or murdered, will serve as an emergency fund for any future issues that might occur.”
Robyn turns towards me and reaches for my hands. “You would do that for me?”
“Well, duh, of course I would.” I nod.
“You don’t know what that means to me, darling.” She kisses my hand and gives me a tight hug before sitting back down. “But I still have to ask: why you? Why does he want to commissionyou? I’d wager he could hire anyone, no? He could hire an entire fleet of consultants to clean up his image.”
“Because I’m good at what I do?” I answer.
“Oh, no. I would never doubt that for a second. It just seems a little strange, doesn’t it? Plus, $5000 is a hefty amount of money.” Robyn’s head tilts to the side, her eyes boring into me.
“Fine! Fine, whatever. If you must know,” I exhale deeply, not only because I am slightly on edge but also because memories of luscious lips and stupid six-packs appear before my eyes, “it’s because I did have relations with that man. I stole his pants after we had sex in an airport bathroom, which lead to his arrest and him almost missing his best friend’s wedding.Butwhen I say it like this, it sounds much worse than it actually was.”
Silence spreads out in the small interior of the cramped van, until Robyn leans forward and extends her palm before Paige, who in response rolls her eyes, rummages through her handbag and puts a butterscotch in Robyn’s hand.
“I don’t bet for money,” Paige explains as Robyn unwraps her prize. “But pray continue, spill the rest of the English breakfast!”
“I mean, it’s a whole thing. I don’t really have time to get into it. Also, did you guys really have a bet going about whether I slept with someone at the wedding?”
“We like to live vicariously through you, darling. And, I guess, Robyn, you’re right, she does seem a little different since she’s come back. But more importantly, is your lover as good looking as his pictures suggest?” Paige grabs the newspaper, displaying an article about Ryker being led away by the police in his boxer briefs.
Naturally, he has a nice butt in that picture as well. Very unfair.
Robyn answers on my behalf, “Absolutely. He must be.”
“I’ve seen better,” I interject.
“And is he really as rich as they say he is?” Guy chimes in as well.
“Exceptionally rich,” Robyn answers.
