Page 51 of Resting Grump Face
“How does one manage to kill a cactus?”
“I could demonstrate on you. You are about as prickly as he was,” I threaten jokingly, look at his irritated face, and try to hide another laugh as our eyes meet, and silence looms over us. It’s not the uncomfortable kind, not the kind where you don’t know what to say to each other. It’s the kind of silence that proceeds a kiss, or in our case probably more of a bar fight. We share a look until Ryker clears his throat.
“You should probably get ready,” he says and puts his coat back on.
“What for?”
“TV,” he states without further explanation. When I make no attempt at getting up, Ryker elaborates, “I have to give an interview on Awkward Pause. And since you’re my PR consultant, you should probably tag along. Otherwise, what am I paying you for? Plus, this was your idea, wasn’t it?”
“Oh,” I say in surprise. I guess I did say something about him getting onto one of those TV shows that the old folks like so much when we had dinner and a show at Hangry. Looks like I am actually about to do some work? “Alright, just give me 30-45 minutes.”
“You have ten.”
I want to argue with him for not telling me sooner, but apparently there’s no time, so I rush into the bathroom, jump under the shower while brushing my teeth, put on some eyeliner and go looking for an outfit.
“Two minutes,” Ryker announces when I exit the bathroom, wrapped only in a towel.
What does one wear to a TV station?
I open my underwear drawer, throw some of the mismatching stuff lying on top out, until I find a nice lace pair that matches. I really need to do some laundry.When I turn around, Ryker —with crossed arms, an annoyed gaze and some panties on his shoulder— taps his watch. I push him to the side, almost lose my towel, and rummage through my closet. I choose something that makes me look professional while still showing off my feminine side.
He nods when I exit the bathroom again. “You look… presentable.”
“Wow,” I feign being flattered. “That’s probably the nicest thing you have said to me so far.”
“Not true. I also once told you you were an opponent.”
“Quite the compliment, indeed.”
“Now you just gotta work on your temper and attitude, and you might actually be more than just a presentable opponent.”
I grab my bag, shove him out the door, and close it behind us.What more would someone like Ryker Grayson hope for than a presentable opponent?I try not to think about it as Miles drives us to the TV station. When we get there, we are greeted and led to the makeup department right away. They put some powder onto Ryker (which he —to my amusement— hates), before the host introduces herself to my client. She does her best to ignore my existence while explaining the procedure of the interview.
I tried doing a mock-interview with him in the car, which he shut down with annoyed glances and aggravated grunts. That smile from earlier was all but gone by then and replaced by his chronic grump-face.
After a segment about a local monkey on the loose, it’s eventually time for Ryker’s interview. The host, Jessica Kidding, lights up when she introduces her guest.
“Mr. Grayson, it’s lovely to have you on… Awkward Pause,” she says and smiles her most charming smile.
To my surprise, the second the camera switches to Ryker, he, too, has a giant smile plastered on his face. It’s not as genuine as the one I’ve seen before, but it’s still charming if you’re the sort of person who likes smiles, I guess.
“Thank you, Jess, and may I say… finally. I’ve been wanting to come on your show for forever. I love the work you do with the Awkward Acts of Kindness Alliance.”
“Oh,” she says and uses her notes to fan herself, “I didn’t know you knew about that.”
“Of course, I try to be involved in local issues as much as I can. I also try to watch your show whenever I have the time, but let’s not talk about that.” He winks at her, eliciting a scoff from me as well as the woman standing to my left, who is also observing the interview.
“Right,” the host says, “I would love to talk about you watching me,” she winks back at Ryker (while me and the woman next to me shake our heads in unison), “but we are actually here to talk about something that happened to you recently.”
Ryker nods, his smile now paired with a little sympathetic frown.
“I think we have the images here.” Jess turns to the monitor to her side. “This is you in all your glory, isn’t it?”
A series of pictures pops up on the screen in which Ryker is walking around the airport in his underwear. Another picture shows two police officers kneeling on his back while a yellow taser is lying on the ground. I take out my phone to take adifferent picture of Ryker Grayson. He does present well in front of a camera.
“Actually, that would be my evil twin. I would never get myself in a situation like this. Plus, I have a nicer butt than him.”
Jess laughs again. “No need to be modest. That’s a perfectly perfect butt if you ask me.”
